It’s hard to go through sadness and helplessness etc. I sometimes wish that I can’t feel emotions at all but that takes out the basic part of being human.
If given the choice, would you rather not feel emotions (to prevent feeling pain)?
“When I walk into a room, even filled with people who hate me, I feel like I’m cumming. Not the orgasm, but the satisfaction that comes with it. That’s how I want to help pothers feel, because it allows you to be unbreakable. And as much as you may think you’re already there, you’re not.”
“And as much as you may think you’re already there, you’re not.”
I’m sorry if I put out the vibe that I think I’m superior or that I get off on […]
I ask this because, maybe I do have friends, but I feel more and more alone each day. I separate myself from them. I try to be somebody for everyone in my classroom, but they just ignore me. I try to do something to impress anyone and feel like I exist, but I fear failure. I have never been able to do anything worthy. I’m so useless.
Please don’t judge me, it’s just that I can’t talk to anyone about this because they will only say I’m an attention seeker. I’m sorry 🙁
Suicide Note
Before reading this, I need you to promise to God that you won’t blame yourselves. It’s not your fault. If you can’t accept this, you may not read any further.
I love you all. And I know that I’m loved. I know you did your best. Thank you for that. But just go on about your daily lives. Please. Take care of your other kids. Take care of your spouses. And, most importantly, take care of yourselves.
I’m just so tired. I don’t know how I even made it this far, honestly. So count that as a blessing. I wrote this note so that I could […]
I suffer from depression… I am allways lonely… I have no reason to feel the way I do but I can’t help it…. I have one friend that I can call a true friend, the rest of the people in my life don’t know me but they call me their friend… They don’t know how I constantly feel… When I wake up I think about ways I would like to die…
When I’m working sometimes I think about ways I could die at work in a “freak accident” I’m hooked on drugs and have become an alcoholic I’m just barely making it by in life just […]
All of this is so triggering, I try to ignore the temptation to make my wrists raw. That’s all on me, though, I should just avoid reading some of the stuff on here I guess…
Since you’re reading this…
Tell me some ways you make yourself feel better (even if it only makes you feel slightly better..) Trust me… I’ll need it
~E
As of today I am 3 months clean but it just doesn’t feel right. I miss my friends but i get anxiety around people.. I’m scared of how they’ll react. It’s about to be a year since I’ve seen any friends.
I don’t want anyone’s pity, that’s not why I post on this site, this is just the only place where I can put down anything
So basically, typical depressed male teenager story, plus a few details
Anyway, I just…I’m lost, I spend most of my time alone, even though I fear isolation, though I’m welcoming it more and more. I was crying during lunch today at school because somebody came up to me and wanted to know what was wrong, and how they could help. But they can’t. I know this is vague, I’ve never been one for details, I don’t talk to people much. Honestly the […]
I spend all day with belt tied around my neck. Desensitizing myself. Tightening just enough to feel rush of blood to the head. Preparing myself to make my death comfortable.
“Maybe if you go to bed you’ll feel better in the morning” is literally just the human version of “Have you tried turning it off and back on again?”
just came across this. wanted to know your thoughts on it because a lot of people get this kind of response.
The  weird curiosity of what would happen if I kept on living or simply shoot myself struggled within me until today.
I have been an observer for quite some time and I would like to share how depression influenced me into the right path.
At the age of 14 depression began showing signs.
I started smoking weed, having sex, drinking and cutting myself. I did what I thought would be best to numb an utterly terrifying feeling of hopelessness and emptiness. I was a lost introvert desperately trying to keep my head up but dove in instead.
High school was a living hell. I would feel miserable as if […]
Haven’t slept in two days. Not depressed, just I get insomnia sometimes. I lie awake in bed with my eyes closed for several hours until my alarm goes off. So work was hard today. But I love my job. I thought about suicide for the first time in months today, but not with much conviction. I didn’t really want to die, not like before, but it just felt like it would be easier. I’ve stopped feeling depression (along with every other complex emotion) thanks to sertraline. It’s been such a long time since I felt happy our scared or angry or ashamed or sad. I […]
My mom texted me a quote which I eventually found floating on tumblr that went like this:
“One awesome thing about Eeyore is that even though he is basically clinically depressed, he still gets invited to participate in adventures and shenanigans with all of his friends. And they never expect him to pretend to feel happy, they just love him anyway, and they never leave him behind or ask him to change.”
I sometimes wish the people in my life were able to not necessarily understand my depression/darkness, but just be able to see me. Just me. And not wish anything different about me.
So I ruined it again….
I was doing so well….
Over a month without one single razor blade piercing my skin and tonight, out of all the nights, I started again.
I really wish this would just end.
I know it helps me feel better, but this is ridiculous.
This wasn’t your average cut either.
I carved a word into my leg…
And now it will most likely scar and be on my body for the rest of my life.
Good one.
I applaud you…NOT!
I want to feel something again.
You’d think I’d like feeling numb to this world, but I don’t.
Not feeling makes it hard to know if I’m alive or not.
I want to feel the pain, to know I’m living.
When I’m numb, well I might as well be dead.
I just want to feel again.
I feel as though my soul is finished here in my current form. I believe that we are conscious beings born to learn lessons on earth that our souls can use to grow. It grows through experience and thought. My conundrum is that from all the lives before, we have all lived many a time and our souls have learnt from these lives. We have been rich, we have been poor. We have loved and we have lost. Every lifetime our souls learn something it has not felt before.
My thought on this life is that my soul has competed it journey. In this life […]
I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real
I wanna let go of the pain I’ve felt so long
(Erase all the pain till it’s gone)
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I’m close to something real
I wanna find something I’ve wanted all along
Somewhere I belong
And I’ve got nothing to say
I can’t believe I didn’t fall right down on my face
(I was confused)
Looking everywhere only to find
That it’s not the way I had imagined it all in my mind
(So what am I)
What do I have but negativity
’Cause I can’t justify the […]
Hey….never have seen this site till today. I was glad to find it. Glad to know im not the only one as I think some times I am. I don’t even know where to start. I guess the beginning will do – I am 47 – male – and very lost. I was adopted when I was 2 months old. Never thought that would become a issue but it has reared its ugly head. My family seemed ok…had nothing to judge it by – my earliest memory was I would say 1 and a half to 2 years old. its when my mom walked me […]
I’m thinking of leaving… This world has so much pain and I don’t want anyone else to feel my pain. How do I get everyone to hate me so that I can leave without the ones who love me feeling pain too?
I don’t even know WHAT to feel. Much less HOW I feel