I have been in a battle with myself for about 2 years. Ever since I was 9 my family has told me that I need to lose weight because im fat. Yeah a 9 year old should lose weight. I’m actually not fat at all but I’m still in a battle to lose weight. i strain myself to work out. I know what you’re thinking just find someone to talk to. Well guess what I don’t have anyone. My mom never listens to me when I try to talk to her about my day or something she completely tunes me out. She has some “mental […]
find
One of the hardest things in life is watching the person you love, love someone else…
Everybody’s got something
They had to leave behindÂ
One regret from yesterdayÂ
That just seems to grow with time…
Â
There’s no use in looking back or wonderingÂ
How it could be now or might have beenÂ
All this I know but still I can’t find ways
To let you know
Â
Somewhere in my memoryÂ
I’ve lost all sense of timeÂ
And tomorrow can never beÂ
Because yesterday is all that fills my mind
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There’s no use looking back […]
Why do people seem to give so much of a shit about whether or not a person they care about cares about them too? Â If someone doesn’t care about you, fuck ’em and find someone who will! Â Or get a dog…
So the only reason that I didn’t cut is because of 3 things. My guy friend who I really like, my mom and because I lost the blades that I cut with. Each day I would go rummaging through my room to find the box that I keep my blades in, because I needed my fix of seeing that blood flow down my wrist, and because I needed to feel the pain. If you’re a cutter, you know what I’m talking about. I finally found them on Thursday last week and I was so happy. 3 weeks of not cutting was kinda hard.
I’ve suddenly found myself in a situation where my life is about to come to a full stop. I’m 29 years old, hold a Master’s degree, and was previously living a very good life. After graduate school I got a job working in a niche consulting firm. I was there for a little less than two years and decided to quit because I was unhappy on a daily basis. Instead of finding a new job before quitting, I impulsively decided to travel the world for three months and come back without any plan. After coming back from my trip, I was offered a great consulting […]
All I want is to find someone. Someone who really understands me, not someone who says they understand but really don’t give a shit. I want to find someone that I can tell everything to, someone that’s been through the Same things as me. But I know for dam sure that won’t happen anytime.
well this is the first time I’ve ever wrote on a site like this.im just trying it out to see if it helps me to deal with my problems as there’s no one I can talk to about it.”I fell like all my male friends think it’s “gay” to show emotions “don’t get me wrong there’s noting wrong with being gay” So a little bit about me, im a 16 year old male I’m into lots of stuff like music and art but not sport (wierd I no ) and I was diagnosed with depression just over a year ago. I find it hard to […]
Lately things have been going good , and yet I still find myself , waiting…
for something bad to happen to remind me that this happiness that has been given to me to  borrow.. To remind me that life has been playing a joke on me and I’m just waiting for the punch line , ..  Why can’t life be easier ?
I suffered so much already I’ve endured what a person could only believe to be nightmares. I’ve only tried to make myself believe that things are okay and they will be different … Â I don’t have to live by my past and let it define […]
My husband died 18 months ago. I am raising my granddaughters age 16 and 20. I will put my house up for sale next spring and move into a small condo I own that will be in same school district for 16 year old. When she has finished high school and gone off to college my plan is to finish cleaning everything out and then kill myself. I plan to give everything away and have liquidated all financial assets except condo. Will have trust redone and everything spelled out for all financial gifts upon my death. Life is too […]
So I’m trying to find another way to do this whole ‘not killing myself’ thing. I’m starting to put my poetry out there too, so if anyone wants to read it or comment in it, the link is http://hellopoetry.com/lookingforeuphoria/
er, thanks and don’t be scared to hate it.
My date is coming up. It’s in May. I haven’t really decided on a method yet but I know I don’t want anyone from my family to find me. I just know how the rest of my life plays out now and it doesn’t seem important to go through the day to day living. I’ll most likely die at work in my 50’s from a heart attack or stroke. My kids will be in college so my wife will have to struggle with the money because my life insurance is only good until I am 50. I figure if I eat a bullet now they […]
Why do I even try to befriend people?
Why do I even try my best to feel loved?
Why do I even try to find people who might care for me?
Why do I even try to hope that someday I will find love?
Why do I even try to stop myself from thinking about suicide?
All I do when I befriend people is hurt them.
All I do when I try to feel loved is get hurt.
All I do when I try to find people who might care for me is to feel useless and unwanted.
All I do when I try to hope […]
your thoughts?
I met God On the edge of town
Where the wind meets the stillness
Where the darkness meets the light
Where the ocean meets the sky
Where the desert meets the rain
Where the earth meets the heavens
On the edge of town I met God
I asked God
Do one thing for me
Send me back in time
Send me to Seattle
Let me go
Find Kurt Cobain
Take away his gun
Take away his bullets
Talk to him
Make him wanna live
Tell him how we love him
Help him see his glory
God Said No
If I sent you back
If you […]
Broken smiles say a lot
Sometimes they’re not what you thought
They change a person, make them hide
and then one day you may find that smile was the one that died
They made hold secrets people don’t care to know
They may hide feeling that are so low
Sometimes you may wonder why that smile appears
When they’re full of the taste of tears
You may wonder what does it gain
when it’s so full of pain
These are the smile you don’t ignore
Or theyâ€ll be gone forever more
Give the help and love
Don’t give hate or a […]
…a temporary solution to a permanent problem.
I can’t separate the things i want, from the things i can’t stand, or handle, or accomplish.
Everything i do want, is attached to enough of something i don’t, to invalidate pursuit.
I can’t find anything that is both available to me, and also worth my efforts to gain it, which are inevitably and irrevocably connected to conditions and/or consequences i can’t, or won’t, endure.
I can’t find, even with all i know and the capacity of my mind to “imagine,” anything… that fills me with both belief and motivation to achieve, accomplish, or attain it… but that is also available, and […]
If i could speak every language that has ever exsisted, i wish i could find the right combination of words to bring her back
It has been a little over three years. I was in depression most of my life but thought that was how life was supposed to be. Until i met her. She was the light that pulled me out of the darkness, out of the lonliness. After dating for over a year i lost her. It has been 3 tears. I still dream about her. I still think about her constantly. I love her so much i cant look at other women. My family are just people i occasionally talk to. Love does not exsist in my life, or in my heart. I gave that to […]
I came across this piece, and found it beautifully portrayed what it is like to suffor from depression, and to be an outsider looking in.
“He inspected her. He undressed every layer of her soul and could find nothing but kindness. A fabric woven from silken dreams, compassion and understanding. She was like the moon, illuminating all that was in darkness. All darkness but her own. He began to see the thick sinking sand that swallowed her, the small pockets of air from which she could breathe. She reached out to all those that passed her, whom would only let her sink further in. Some which […]
I don’t know why I’m still here… but I’m still here.
Pills aren’t working. I still feel the same way as I did the night I did it. I am focusing on me and what I want… which I’m finding isn’t much. Maybe if I wanted more out of life I could find more.
Personality Test – Choose any Tree and check your Personality… ^_^
Look at the tree and choose the one that is immediately most appealing to you.
Pick your tree before you look at the results!
Don’t think about it too long, just choose, and find out what your choice says about your personality, please have FUN and share your choice in the comments below…
The results!
You are a generous and moral (not to confuse with moralizing) person. You always work on self-improvement. You are very ambitious and have very high standards. People might think that communicating with you […]
yes I wish I could just give my life to someone who was dying for some one facing death yet  wanted to live that’s how bed I want to die im going to end my life soon as I find a good way to end it im 51 years old and sick of life