I feel like I don’t deserve everything that is given to me but I came to enjoy them. People’s kindness. I don’t quite understand it. I don’t want to accept it because I feel guilty. I know that I don’t deserve anything. I know I’m disgusting. I don’t know what I’m capable of. There are a lot of unanswered ‘what-ifs’ and ‘ors’ I don’t know my own emotions. If I’m crying for them or for my sake. Am I truly happy or did I just encountered an amusing thing that will eventually leave. Am I unmotivated or am I just lazy. Am I depressed or […]
Tag:
Gray Area
Comment responses:
adventuregirl – I am suicidal. Â I’ve already attempted before, with 96 sleeping pills. Â Unless something changes soon, another attempt (probably successful) is imminent. Â I’m 19 by the way. Â Me and her were not in romantic relationship, although I did want one with her. Â But I was okay just having her as a best friend. Â I left the story off at January 3rd, 2011….as you can see I still have all of 2011 and some of 2012 to explain. Â So everyone is missing a lot of information, and it’s no one’s fault but my own for not typing it up yet. Â The fact that I’ll […]