Yet again the voices in my head have won another night.
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in my head
This is just what i think in my head… I just wrote what i was thinking at that moment but please help me.. -brian m. R.
Well… Im back i guess thats a bad thing…how can i get this suicidle feelings off my chest?!? How can i be straight ?! ???????? i know thats never gonna happen .. So why do I still wish it?!?! Being bisexual is a curse…..why did i have to fall in “love” with my best friend since 3ed grade?!? Fuck i cant…. Should i just forget about him ?!? Should i kill my self?!? Should i run away again?!? Should i […]
Hi I’m a little afraid to do this but here it goes.
My name is destine. Lately I’ve been depressed. I think it’s just everything . that’s been going on. I don’t live with my mom and dad. My mom passed a way tho. I lost contact with most of my friends and my family. Because my aunt and uncle. They adopted us. They would be really mean. Put me and down. And a lot of other things to me and my little brother. I’ve missed my old life with my mom still alive and everything.
ive been lost not knowing what to do. I’ve cut before […]
Every day of my life I think about suicide, even just in passing. I hear people talk about it as if the know a damn thing about how it feels to prefer the inky blackness of the nothing that comes after death over life. I have one person in this world that keeps me going and some days she’s what gets me up in the morning. I can’t be certain I deserve this fate or that I don’t deserve it, but I am aware that I have no choice in the matter. I’ll explain why I’m here in the first place though, I am an […]
I think I’m poison. I made it through the holidays through sheer will and maybe some kind of grace. But now…it’s a new year and so, yeah…what now, right? I’m just breathing and I even forget to do that sometimes. It’s like I’m waiting on something. Holding my breath. Expectant. And I guess that is kind of hope, right? So there is that. And there is my kid. Who is…well, everything. But then there is all of the other stuff which is big and small and there’s me who messes up and I have honestly begun to think maybe I am poison.
All my life I […]
I don’t know why I’m depressed. If someone asked me why or if I was writing a suicide note and trying to explain it, I wouldn’t know what to say. My parents are constantly at each others throats, have been for as long as I can remember. I’ve seen violence in my family, even been on the receiving end of it a few times. My old school was horrible, my classmates hated me and always made me feel like there was something wrong with me. But those three reasons are all I can think of and they’re not even that bad. My parents love me […]
Now I’m gonna have that song in my head. I don’t want to die. I just … don’t want to live, either. Can you commit suicide by apathy? What if I just stop taking my meds, stop eating, stop drinking, stop doing anything other than lay in my bed and stare at the wall and remind myself that I’m a cold-hearted monster that breaks everything, that can’t really love, and that no one will ever love back? I hope my cats wait until I’m dead to start nibbling at my body for survival, but, well, c’est la vie. It’s […]
I’m so confused…like during the day I’m fine and all but when I get home I just get these voices in my head telling me that I’m worthless and ugly and so many more names. I try to let out my pain by cutting but it doesn’t work anymore…I don’t feel it…I’m numb. I’m scared to tell my friends that I harm myself because they make jokes about people killing themselves and hurting themselves…I can’t lose them because they are all I have…I’m dying on the inside…I’m trapped…if I lose them then it’ll drive me off the edge…I’m scared to ask for help…I’m scared of […]
My father told me that he thinks our cat is “on the way out”. On Christmas Eve. All I could say is “Why would you say that to me?” and go to the bathroom, my safe place. I turned on the water and cried for half an hour, my mind going to different places where I would be in less emotional turmoil. I wish I could experience everything I imagine for real, but I am not meant for any of that. I thought maybe I made it up in my head, and my father didn’t say any of that to me. He didn’t even apologize […]
I feel alone and lonely these last few months I became very sensible and I had changed in my character . I feel tired in my head and in my body . I just feel like crying and something is killing me from inside. I had really thought about it and I think suicide is my the best solution .I can see everyone is getting love only me. I can see everyone is having new accomplishments in their lives only me. sometimes I think if I was living or not its the same thing. and I am the kind of person who hides their […]
It seems tht everything is turning black to me, I feel that i’m getting into a darkness that I can handle it… I feel broken, the this that were precious to me, they’re all gone, I’ve realized that I hate myself, I can’t do anything well, my mom tells me all the time that I’m useless and I know that it’s true… Honestly I write all the time but I can say everything that is in my head. Lately I’ve felt so angry and I can’t get out all that anger from my body, I don’t know what to do, […]
I am 24 and I have struggled with these thoughts since I have been 16 or so there are voices in my head that constantly tell me I will never be good enough I will never be happy I have tried to kill my self so many times the only thing in my life that has stopped me is moving on without me I held a loaded 45 to my head last night and I have never come that close to ending myselfy my parents have said that everything that’s wrong with there life is my fault and they have no son my girlfriend is […]
My life has not been exactly what you would call easy. I got charged with a rape I never committed at the age of 20. It shall follow me forever as they put me on the sex offenders registry. I honestly did nothing. Life went on and I fell in love. My ex took my kids and now will not let me see them, I stayed single for a long time, finally found love again, she left me for whatever reasons she might have had. Everyone who knows me really doesn’t like me that much. Judgements and all. Everyday I am reminded of just how […]
I dont know exactly how to word this. Nor do i know why i feel the way i do every single day. Im often wasting my life away, feeling that damn tired feeling that makes me want to lay down and wish for the pain in my heart to stop. I keep asking myself why when the pain consumes my mind, suicide rings like a clear message.
Im a 19 year old, high school graduate male. Bisexual in my tastes, and the abomination the church I once sought comfort in, would now view me if i come out. I’ve never had a relationship. I’m dead scared […]
I’m turning 19 tomorrow but I feel like my life is over. The one person who I was close to is having her funeral a few days later. No one else matters to me anymore. I’m thinking of just ending it today but I know she would’ve never forgiven me. I wish there was another way but I can’t help forming these thoughts in my head. And to think, it would be so easy. The pills are right in the other room. How hard could taking an overdose be? The only thing that’s making […]
I feel so glad to have found this site. I just want to say what I’ve felt for so long without the typical, “It’ll get better! You’ll be fine!”. I’ve attempted suicide 3 times. First time I chickened out of shooting myself, second time I drank 5 energy drinks and took sleep aids and that didn’t work. I’m just a freshman in college…I did this in high school. The third time almost worked I think. I suffocated myself with duct tape. Sounds stupid, right? I woke the next morning. My lungs were on fire and my sides hurt, but I woke up. For a while […]
I feel rejected by the outside world. I am not sure where I fit in anymore. I am very sad today and hurt because I am not the same person I was before a couple weeks ago after my attempt. I am grateful to be here but I’m very lonely and confused. If anyone can help I would appreciate knowing how you came to accept your life. I am part of a community that believes I relapsed but even admitting that I still feel depressed and crazy in my head. What can I do?
Yes Creed.
Still alive folks. worried because I’m struggling not to slide into sadness again. I mean things do feel a bit different now that I’m on meds but I’m starting to think abut death a few times a day instead of one or two. And not always as a joke or an escape.
Started going to church again but it’s weird cuz it’s not the denomination i’m used to but there is a lot of singing and hugs so I’m figuring it out. I’m trying to see if being connected with God or the Universe will make this all feel different.
I constantly have to do lists in […]
I use to be a funny girl who loves to live and enjoy everything in life and to try new things but due to a love relationship , every thing had changed … I tried to suicide but I didn’t die and I’m thinking to suicide again because I feel too much pressure on me and no one can understand me . I know this my effect my parents but I can’t stay like this dying every day. I am crying every day since 3 months in my room … but I smile in front of my friends and family because I don’t like […]
A family member and two celebrities killed themselves this year. We know Robin Williams, but another is a well-known innovator in the veterinarian world (Sophia Yin). I relate to Sophia the most.
People around me tell me that I’m amazing and can’t believe what I’m accomplishing; I’m such a good friend; I’m an amazing animal trainer. They confide in me that they are ultra depressed. One family member is in/out of a mental ward. My mother and father are now gone; my brother doesn’t keep in touch. I contacted someone who once loved me (I think?) but who always hurt me…I’m forgettable or ignorable or… Why […]