I sold everything I own and gave every last dime to US immigration services for them to process my paper work. Every last dime and I a still stuck in Jamaica. I did some things I am not proud of to get that paperwork going. Some really unclean things. Oh lord I wish I could wash my hands of those things. But I can’t. Stained. Scared. I really want to fly out but can’t afford that $250 ticket. The man that petitioned for me, he and I had a falling out. I hope he doesn’t go to immigration and get my green card revoked. Cause […]
Tag:
man
When I get up from being down I always try to get a new start. Make myself different like a new man. I try to get a new start to erase my mistakes. The next day everyone sees me, notices me. This kills me since I just want people to forget me. Remembering me is remembering my failures. So now instead of a new me people see a new failure to be made. How can I hold my head up high when every can see my flaws? A reason I would hate to die is because before I’m forgotten everyone would bring up the worst […]
Why since we ve been on this planet do we treat one another so bad? All through out history is rape, murder, slavery, war, starvation. So why is it considered a blessing to live?The things we suffer as individuals is nothing really when compared to all that life has dished out to all that has lived.Are we here to further insure that this madness continues .we complain about our individual lives , but what about this blessing called life.Im sickened by the whole history of man.If this is a blessing I would hate to see a curse.when does the madness end? Although I been very […]
Everyone has their own overwhelming burdens ….. non are less than anyone elses….. mine have just become too great. i have lost my children. I had all that i could ever of hoped for…. i was adored by a beautiful perfect lady and i screwed it up. No…. not like that…. i just screwed it all up. I am not a bad man… i just have had so much pain over the years i didnt know how to just enjoy life when it became perfect.
I am now completely alone…. just wanted to say goodbye to somebody.
thank you.
On my way to hell…I passed a lonely church.. the congregation weakened by the warnings of the words.. scriptures toppling proverbs under a deceitful preacher’s curse.. what would they have to say, as they lay me into dirt… many places you can turn but where he goes is worse… don’t be this man you see inside, instead we close the box for good..lay it down to rest, pave it over as we should..
no need for leaving markers we seek to find one day.. if you listen hard enough, you can hear a dead man say.. heaven never had me, and claims of shallow graves.. […]
So right now im sitting in the living room of my home, watching my fiancée pack her things to leave. And it’s killing me. I can’t stand it. I haven’t much to say, just to say I’m sorry. I failed you, in so many ways and therefore I deserve this. Which is why I have decided to end my life tonight. You’ll leave, and be happy. And I’ll be happy too. You told me that you want me to think of my happiness first now. Well that’s what I’m going to do. Tonight after you close the door for the last time, I will wrap […]
I’m so tired of being a punching bag. Why do you have to push all of your ideals, veiws and bs on me. I’m wearing out real fast now and I have no idea how much longer I’ll be able to last….
If you hate me so much now and have regrets the why the hell did you even keep me ariund.
Well dont worry. You know my favorite saying a man is known by the silence he keeps… I guess I’ll take that saying literally and become silent forever.
You can see me down in that place where I try so hard to wave..my arms burdened by gravity holding them to my face.. so heavy and so hot..believe me or not it’s my fate. The next step I take means too much to take and so I’ve stood still waiting for my will again.
Repair these broken hands.. what is there left to grip? Repair this broken man for the sake of broken lips. Come apart to let you in and hold me down to fix.
Put me back the way I was and I’ll just fall apart again. Reconstruct this broken heart […]
why do i feel so bad? my life is perfect so why do i want to see all the pain ooze out of my wrists? i love my girlfriend and shes why im alive, yet i beg for the feeling of not feeling anything. should i man up an live with it and keep it hidden or tell her my pain? why do they tell you it will all be ok when you get help? that the magic pills will save you? that the people will remember and continue to care when they eventually forget? why?
I used to believe anything was possible. Straight A’s. Got into a good university fresh from high school.
I always wanted to cure the acne scars on my face. I thought no man would love me with these scars. So I paid for a laser treatment. It did not make things better, it made things worse. Now half of my face is beautiful and untouched and the other, treated half is ruined. I can’t help but think this affects everything people think about me. The bad half of my face makes me looks sloppy, stupid and trollish.
Worse yet, it is all my fault. And so are […]
You know that feeling that you get every time you get so scared that your heart feels like it’s going to drop to your stomach? Like there is someone ripping your heart out, artery by artery? That’s the feeling I get every time I lay my eyes on him. He ruined me. He ruined my family. The love, the trust, everything. It all vanished because of that selfish old man. Why me? Why us? What did WE do to deserve to go through these horrible couple of years? We were nothing but kind to him. We helped him in any way possible. He seemed kind to us […]
Yeah well I’m gonna be the first and I’m going to alienate some people here, but we, in Australia, just lost a visionary in Gough Whitlam. Wow, what a mark he left on our land and our consciousness. He was a visionary and a reformist. To some he made have tried to do too much but what a legacy he left in just a short time. Not many people get to do what he did and I personally want to bring his achievements to this site. Please explore this great man in Australian politics. Few get the chance to make their mark…he did. Vale Gough […]
“A Nightmare Bruce Wayne, Are You A Hero”
An Crane, what kind of man have you became
My first child-hood friend here under the sun
What would you, can you know the truth
Do you fly or, don’t leave me in my chain
This one’s for you, what kind of man can we
Here, it has been the end so long ago
Eternal, rotting death, my path to the sky
This has been the last, the last spit
Black dragon, Ouroboros clan, a white lotus
I can no longer, are you Robin or Nightwing
Back when we were ten-years-old
When I first came to the air of […]
It would have been cool
If I could have rolled out
Tonight, the carnage in Arkham
At 10 PM, I see Poison Ivy
Penguin walks with a cane
So far away in spiritual realm
Nothin’ but a spam call’ me Bisban
And the Joker and it’s empire
I don’t want to be another day
Who the fuck, who the fuck am I
I saw the Catwoman, I saw little Robin
I am the nightmare, all in my hell
Mr. Freeze the glass man
I wish I was hot like the Croc
Harvey never came back
“Rot; S.O.S. Nebula, To Lugia”
These beats are so deep like you
I am, I forget the next line
I am such dead and it so hurts
Can you be, can you know
The ultimate, the multiple
All in the arcane, so dark
I go to become, the crazy Machamp
Weezing, Muk, and Arbork
Green, can you be a Victreebel
But you are, Bulbasaur
Or are you something else
I want to be a Hitmonlee, headless
Doing my Kung-Fu to the death
Strange, shattered and the feeble
Do I bust a triple
Indeed I go to go die
For me to die from the chain
I need the power, mythical bird
In my rotting blood destroy […]
…and the people who frequent it, the drifters, the lurkers, the class-clowns, the drama queens, and everyone in-between. I may not post much, but I read, or at least skim over, most of the posts here. Why do I find what depressed and suicidal people have to say so fascinating? Ugh, idk man. Probably because I’m crazy too. Whatever the case may be, SP has been a weird sort of bastion for me, so I thought I’d throw this out there.
Here’s to Shep, the Kiwi of many names, inspiring many a pondering and many a laugh with thought-provoking posts and witty comments alike. Introduced […]
Music flowed from my hands
at one time
but no more
Love poured from my soul
at one time
but no more
Sunshine, warm and healing flooded my window
at one time
but no more
Someone delighted in my touch
at one time
but no more
I was paid fairly and respected at work
at one time
but no more
I could chase seagulls and climb sand dunes
at one time
but no more
I could follow my dreams
at one time
but no more
I had something to give to my fellow man
at one time
but no more
My life was an adventure, not a nightmare
at one time
but no […]
Hello, I first want to say I hope everyone is having a good day. I suppose mine would be a bit better if you all in the SP community could clear something up for me if you would. I have seen that you all wish to attack a certain member on here called Squid. And I do not wish to start anything by this post and I am sure you all will start in with your reasons of why he is indeed a Pedophile. I only wish to truly understand with clear evidence what is causing this to be said and nothing more. I do […]
I don’t know if I’m a lesbian or just confused. I’m in a relationship with a man. We’ve been together for a long time. But lately everything feels fake. I don’t know if I’m attracted to the idea of lesbianism, if I want a clever and easy word to describe myself, or if I’m just tired of all these men chasing after me. Sometimes I think about women when I’m with my boyfriend. I hate that. I wish I could give him what he needs, but I don’t feel adequate. I wish I was better. I wish I was more nice and less selfish. But […]
“She is not someone you understand. She is someone you watch, someone you use, someone you mourn. She is made for love but love is not made for her. Everything about her runs deeper than in you; her madness is truer, her mind brighter and better broken, and her anguish is in her bones, not her blood. You will never forgive her for dying, but she will aways be dead forever, and your horror means nothing to her anymore. That, more than anything is why you still dream about her and her flowers thrown like curses. She has made herself no longer yours to dream […]