I hate having a scientific mind, it’s like I can’t have a normal life because I’m thinking of things along the lines of “I feel like we are made of nothing, the whole concept of how we live life and how we sleep is unexplainably weird. We have eyes, mouths and ears.. We are walking limps.” It all sounds funny but it gives me this really nasty hopeless feeling. Trapped in my mind kinda thing. I wish I could think what normal people think but I’ve bypassed that mentality long ago. I’m living for my family and boyfriend in whom I love dearly. […]
Tag:
Nasty
This is my 17th year on Earth. I honestly didn’t expect to make it this far, and yet, I have. Over the past couple of years I have tried so many times to get help, sometimes it helps for a little while but I still end up back in the same horrible place. I’m at the point now where I don’t believe that there is any hope for me and I’ve accepted that. I just want to get everything that needs to be done before I die done, that is why I am writing this. I haven’t really shared my story before, I don’t even […]
I hate feeling like this every day. I hate never wanting to get out of bed. I hate knowing that things will never get better no matter how hard I try. I hate knowing that I was doomed from the start to end up like this. I hate how other girls  whine and complain about how terrible their lives are, and yet they have boyfriends. Like, seriously, SHUT UP. At least SOMEONE cares. At least you have enough luck that guys are willing to be seen in public with you and you still have the hope of a happy ending. I have no hope. I have no […]
I realize that this is a repeat of last evening. I apologize for bothering everyone all over again. I’m so sorry to bother you all again. Please forgive me… I want to die, but I don’t want anyone to care. I want them to rejoice with me, and celebrate my life, not mourn my death. I want them to love me for who I was, not who I have become. I am a nasty, bitter, selfish little *****. I hate myself. And so do you, deep down. You don’t know me, but somewhere in you too bleeding hearts, you harbor a nasty disgust for me. […]
Have you ever had a moment where you’re just thinking, not about anything in particular.. and those innocent thoughts take a nasty turn? Next thing you know you’re talking yourself out of hurting yourself. Moments of insanity I like to call them. When something in your head shifts ever so slightly and everything you’ve stuffed and hidden inside for twenty years tries to get out? It over loads the brain and you just want to make it stop. You’d do anything for the memories and the pain to leave.
I’ve never been able to fully tell anyone the whole story. Why not a bunch of random […]
Okay, i’m 13 years old. I have to repeat the 7th grade. I would’ve passed it, but i left my school 3 weeks early. That school stressed me out, to the point where i just couldn’t do it. i never wanted to go back there again. i only had about 2-3 friends at the end of the year. i like, pushed everyone away. i don’t even know how. right now, it’s about a month and a half into summer. i moved across town, so i’m going to be starting a new school. i lost connection with all my friends from my previous school, but like […]
You can call me Robert for now, even though that’s not my true name. You’ll never know my actual name, unfortunately, because I won’t be around to tell it to you. Obviously, i plan to kill myself, but you would be mistaken if you thought that i was sad right now. As a matter of fact,this is the first time that I’ve felt happy in years! Finally, finally, I have found a way to end myself; to put a stop to the horrible thing that is my mind.
Over the years, I have been plagued with psychopathy. I couldn’t even walk down the fucking street without […]
I’m not perfect and I am by no means trying to say I didn’t do my fair share of. Hurtful thing. But why can you not take any responsibility for your damage you incurred? And why do you have to be so mean and spiteful and down right nasty. Just because something is different doesn’t mean its opposite. nothing is different but everything is unique. a fact is a fact. Cannot be changed but truth is objective. Preception is reality and no one can tell keep it from you. I hate that u won’t allow us to both be right. Its always a battle. […]