It’s been a brutal semester. I just need to get this out, so I can concentrate on completing my final paper. I’m feeling tremendously overwhelmed. Failure weighs heavily, on my mind, I got kicked out of university my first year, I took too many classes, yes my parents pressured me, but I could have said no and I missed the deadline to withdraw without penalty. One of my friend’s had the same problem and she found out we could talk to the dean, I didn’t show up for my appointment with the dean because I believed all the things I had ever heard about myself […]
Tag:
Note To Self
Why am I such a stupid fuck? I really cant stand myself. 2 hours by myself and I’m “in a mood” again. Wasn’t even contemplaiting suicide this morning because I was working a bit and suddenly, like a fingersnap, I just want to die. I remember that I despise myself. And that I’m the most disgusting monster on the planet.
I like being by myself, because I can do whatever I want. But I guess I really need distraction. Especially if I havent smoked weed yet. Thought I should smoke less so I didnt smoke yet. (no thats a lie I tell myself, I didnt earn […]