Tag:

rare

I am sure that my only option is suicide

by UselessAndHopeless 12/12/2015

written by UselessAndHopeless

22, male suffering from emotional, mental and physical pain.

No real friends. They all left after high school and the ones I kept are either doing their own thing or gone separate ways. I don’t go out or socialize. If I do, it’s rare.

Riddled with anxiety. Can’t get a girlfriend, still a Virgin. Hopeless at talking to girls and developing new friendships or relationships. Good talk but never goes anywhere far. I’m seen as too nerdy or mature. I just hate how people view me as some sort of stranger.

Physical pain. Suffering from back pain, shoulder pain, knee pain. Can’t do anything physical anymore. Job involves […]

12/12/2015 9 comments

Its a full time job staying here.

by SecludedDilemna 10/16/2015

written by SecludedDilemna

Im new here, and already after reading some of these posts I feel like I have found my people . haha. I dont know where to begin. Isnt that ironic? Since I dont know how to end it either? Man, Im funny.

Im a lonely, cowardice, self loathing 22 year old mother and wife who lives in a repetitive world that she oh so badly wants out of. Im very exhausted from living a lie.. Living to make sure to not step on my husbands toes.. I long for connection. I wont get it from him. When he attepmts, which is rare, it is forced.. I […]

10/16/2015 7 comments

Can’t go on!

by Sideways 10/14/2015

written by Sideways

I’m a loving husband and father. After taking an a antidepressant and subsequently stopping it a matter of weeks later I developed a rare physical condition for which prognosis is dubious and treatment is extremely painful. It has interfered with EVERY aspect of my life and is debilitating both physically and mentally.

I was negligently put on a benzodiazepine which I’m trying to taper off and is proving difficult, it’s destroyed my health. I have fought this for over a year via physical therapy and various different forms of medication. I look and feel awful, I have had to move in with my parents and can […]

10/14/2015 4 comments

by LetItGo 2/11/2015

written by LetItGo

Its stupid i feel like this
I shouldnt need anyone
I shouldnt feel this lonely all the time
I shouldnt depend on anyone

I want to be strong and not depend on them
But they make me feel nice when i talk to them
But its rare now a days
The moments where we actually talk

They want to be left alone for hours
But all i need for hours is human contact

I wish they noticed
That i need them so fucking much

But they never do.

2/11/2015 10 comments

I am Ill, not Invisible

by cottoncandy 1/30/2015

written by cottoncandy

I have been confined to my house for 3 years and confined to bed for long periods of time due to severe, progressive Rheumatoid Arthritis and Anemia. These are my 2 worst health problems out of 30+ diagnosed chronic illnesses.

If you see me on the very rare occasion at a store, you would assume I am heathy. This is why the term “invisible illness” describes many conditions when visible effects of the illness have yet to appear.

My family finally accepted that I need regular rest, i’m crabby, and i am constantly experiencing pain when I was diagnosed with RA. Now they leave me […]

1/30/2015 1 comment

A lonely anime fan & advocate of the right to die (m,42) is looking for a significant other

by Brightshadow 1/10/2015

written by Brightshadow

Probably I’ll be flamed by some people here, but the chances are – if nothing changes, in a few years I won’t be here anymore anyway. I guess, it’s better to regret having tried something, rather than regret not having tried it…

Why post it here instead of trying some singles / dating sites? I tried it. I won’t go into details, otherwise my post would be too long.

I’m looking for a soulmate. People believing in the right to die and not scared of […]

1/10/2015 15 comments

Cherry Wine

by Deleted.from.society 11/13/2014

written by Deleted.from.society

Her eyes and words are so icy
Oh but she burns
Like rum on the fire
Hot and fast and angry
As she can be
I walk my days on a wire

It looks ugly, but it’s clean
Oh momma, don’t fuss over me

The way she tells me I’m hers and she is mine
Open hand or closed fist would be fine
The blood is rare and sweet as cherry wine

Calls of guilty fall on me
All while she stains
The sheets of some other
Thrown at me so powerfully
Just like she throws with the arm of her brother

But I want it, it’s a crime

11/13/2014 0 comment

All I want is to leave this place

by melsxxdm 8/30/2014

written by melsxxdm

I’ve wanted to kill myself for the past 3 years. I attempted it twice but failed both times, the first time with pills and the second with a razor to my wrist. On the rare occasions where I feel happy, I get home and cut myself. It’s the worst feeling ever. Someone should put me into a coma, I want to sleep forever.

8/30/2014 2 comments

The emptiness and numbness

by alina_01 8/27/2014

written by alina_01

It comes back and just consumes me and even when I try to feel I can’t. I feel empty and I’m alone I should feel sad but instead I feel nothing. Ugh it is the most annoying thing ever! I watched a movie recently, one of those rare weird movies that people typically don’t tend to watch. And I made such a connection I felt understood like I could understand, of course on certain levels because not each person and situation is the same. But I shared a similar pain and it sucks and im so numb this very second that I don’t care enough […]

8/27/2014 1 comment

Easy does it

by tbd 8/2/2014

written by tbd

I’m feeling really defective right now.

I went to a special “designer” research hospital in New York last month. Today, the super bill came with the diagnosis codes. I haven’t received their final report yet, but one of the diagnoses has sort of kicked me in the gut and I don’t feel like I can talk with any family member about it lest they throw it in my face.

It has to do with cognitive impairment which can arise from head trauma or prolonged medical treatments. Full recovery is rare. I guess you’d have to see what I have trouble with now, compared […]

8/2/2014 15 comments

Succesful SP suicides?

by Stain 6/2/2014

written by Stain

I’m sure some people are tempted to view this site as a bunch of whiners talking about suicide but never doing anything. Or as my own idiot therapist said: “Why talk about it? If you’re going to do it, then do it.”

But the truth is that many SP users have actually gone ahead and done it. They post here as a last stop before the unknown, and then they cross over. So no, we’re not just a bunch of lookie-lous.

I was wondering if anyone had been keeping a list of confirmed, or very likely, suicides of SP users. Maybe it would be nice to have […]

6/2/2014 7 comments

He wins

by Kallian 4/25/2014

written by Kallian

Yup. I’m giving up on the hope that anyone will tell Alexis to knock it the fuck off. No matter how many times I complain, or how many times I blatantly say I want to talk to the store manager about this and file harassment charges, nothing happens. He gets to go around telling people that he has an ex who’s pregnant. Well, guess who the first person people think of when he says “ex”…yup, me. Ok, I want this set straight. I’m a virgin. Never done it. Probably never will. Explain how I get pregnant…other than the God thing, but seeing as I don’t […]

4/25/2014 3 comments

These Dreams make up for a lot.

by fortunear 3/10/2014

written by fortunear

Â Beauty is not the goalÂ of competitive sports, but high-level sports are a prime venue for the expression of human beauty. The relation is roughly that of courage to war.The human beauty weâ€™re talking about here is beauty of a particular type; it might be called kinetic beauty. Its power and appeal are universal. It has nothing to do with sex or cultural norms. What it seems to have to do with, really, is human beingsâ€™ reconciliation with the fact of having a body

Thereâ€™s a great deal thatâ€™s bad about having a body. If this is not so obviously true that no one needs examples, […]

3/10/2014 3 comments

Would you be able to save “you”?

by Stain 3/5/2014

written by Stain

If you were someone outside yourself looking at the person you are now, if you knew how badly “you” were suffering and knew what words & actions, if any, could ease the pain, if you knew “your” mind so well that you wouldn’t waste a minute doing the useless things that others try unsuccessfully, and most importantly if you really cared about “you” and would never give up, would you be able to save “you”?

You would always know exactly what to say. You would always understand exactly what’s going on. You would know exactly what would bring out a smile, a laugh, or that rare […]

3/5/2014 8 comments

I don’t want to die, but I can’t live like this

by Windy 2/27/2014

written by Windy

Hey.

I’m 23, trans, and recently diagnosed with thoracic and a rare cervical scoliosis. It’s not so extreme that it’s noticeable with clothes on but, in a way, that makes it worse. Without clothes it’s fairly easy to spot if you know what you’re looking for. I’ve known about the asymmetries for years, but I didn’t realise they were part of a Â bigger problem, just “bad posture”. My parents never noticed it because I hid it (secretly I was ashamed of it). Everytime I brought it up with my parents they’d tell me “stop slouching over the computer” or “stop carrying heavy bags”–implying that I was […]

2/27/2014 2 comments

Another poem that (I think) anyone will understand. What do I know?

by PennyroyalTea 10/5/2012

written by PennyroyalTea

Every breath
we’ve lost our game
Are we undead?
let me go ahead

Drain your heart, drain your veins
no love means no pain
I drink bleach and anesthesia
injectionsÂ of kisses and magnesia

I need a clue
the signal of the truth
cowards are unhappy
smells like nappies

Because of my empathy
thanks to my human side
that’s why I’m burning your eyes
don’t want you to feel that cold inside

10/5/2012 2 comments