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searching

I want to die right now, not tomorrow.

by ilovecats 5/21/2014

written by ilovecats

Hi all.

I am new to this (TSP).

Since yesterday Â have been in my room in front of my laptop searching, reading, and hoping. Wanting more than anything to find the solution to what I have always wanted: to die. For a few hours I thought I had found the way out. Twelve hours later, more reading and planning shattered my plans. I thought that finally I would have a successful suicide. Now I am desperate and frantically searching for another way to end my life.

As I write this, I am looking at my cat explore my desk. She makes me smile. She may be the only […]

5/21/2014 5 comments

Stranded

by jjistheword 4/17/2014

written by jjistheword

My feelings crash in my mind,

just as the tide rolls in and out.

I’m calling for help,

yet nobody seems to hear.

I feel like an ocean,

searching for new places to spread.

Yet, I cannot spread until I am found.

Just like the ocean,

I’m lost & stranded.

4/17/2014 0 comment

Are there any other good pro suicide websites/forums?

by pbsman 3/10/2014

written by pbsman

I’ve been searching all over google (I know that’s amateurish) but no matter how I try, I can’t find any. Can you guys help me out? And please for the love of god please do not preach to me, I’ve heard it all before. So yeah, any recommendations?

3/10/2014 6 comments

Suicide notes

by nyny 2/23/2014

written by nyny

Pencil and paper,Â is that all it takes?

wrong.It takes perfect words

sweet time,Â a million tears

strength?Â to write

to pour out your feelings?

to say goodbye?

letting go seems easy

til its written out

onto a clean sheet of paper

the hours you spent writing

searching for the right words

answering questions, that may be inquired

deciding when you should do it

is there ever a perfect time to go?

you’ve written several notes before

but this time it overwhelms you

your train of thought? gone?

your tears? never ending?

death? undecided?

that note will never be read.

at least not for a while.

is it not perfect yet?

or does fear take over?

it’s folded, neatly

slid away with the rest

waiting.

for another day

2/23/2014 6 comments

Semper Vigilans- Part II

by Soldier1861 2/9/2014

written by Soldier1861

a few months ago, I wrote a poem. Here it is now:

For I am Civil Air Patrol. No single word can
Describe who I am, what I do or what I
Sacrifice at such a young age…there is no phrase
That can sum up what we do. We sacrifice
Ourselves for the needy, the misfortunate
And grieving. We cross boundlessly across
Dead and barren terrain, hopelessly searching
For one soul. We receive no pay. No special
Treatment. No acclaim. We simply fight.
Fight for freedom and tranquility within our
Borders.

For I am Civil Air Patrol.
The blood we’ve spilt within 72 years is
Tremendous. Over […]

2/9/2014 8 comments

First

by amoral 1/28/2014

written by amoral

I’d like anyone reading this to take note of every word I write.

I’m furious.
I’m nearly murderous.
I’m hateful.
I’m blackening in my rage.
My thoughts would scour your minds clean,
Leaving you incapacitated, searching for answers.

The truth is, I’m sad and lonely, just like all of you.
But unlike the majority of you, I choose to unleash my sadness in a glorious rage.

I don’t take drugs,
I don’t cut myself,
I don’t starve myself,
I am better than that.
I choose to be furious and attack everything with the ferocity and indignation that only true insanity can grantâ€¦
And there is a distinct possibility […]

1/28/2014 6 comments

The doubt

by TheGlassChild 1/10/2014

written by TheGlassChild

The thing that make me doubt the most about killing myself… it’s that I fear I would not really get this relief feeling that I’m searching for. You know, you’re in pain, and you just don’t want to feel it anymore… but I think that when you’re dead, you don’t even realize that the pain is gone, ’cause you know, you’re not alive to feel it. If I could be guaranteed that there is something after death. That there’s another world where you can enjoy not to be alive anymore… i would be gone for a while now.

1/10/2014 9 comments

Is it possible to get better?

by hurt 11/19/2012

written by hurt

I’m stuck. I feel like I can’t get better and this inability to move past my trauma is limiting my ability to live my life the way I want too. I try. I can go months without hurting myself and then something that is seemingly random breaks my illusion of healthiness and I fall backwards on my ass to the depths of despair. I can’t seem to forgive myself for shit that has gone wrong…and the more I try to examine my issues I feel the higher the chance of relapse. I don’t have a support system […]

11/19/2012 4 comments

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