my heart is a trinket, with a broken St. Christopher and a used subway ticket
Tag:
Subway
I keep having mental and nervous breakdowns over the stupidest things. For one, when ever i think of my job (subway) i wanna break down crying because i hate it so much. Just having the dog pee on my bed will set me off into a huge crying and sobbing episode that will last for hours. I have panic attacks when that happens. I am seeing a psychiatrist and i dont know how to bring up the fact that i think i need xanax or ativan or something because when i have those episodes i become very suicidal. I have bipolar by the way so […]
I don’t even know if you could call me suicidal. I’ve never actually attempted it, but I have thoughts about killing myself so often. I’ve had an eating disorder for over a year, and over the past few months, I’ve started cutting. I feel depressed all the time now. I’m just never happy anymore, I make excuses so I don’t have to go out, and see people, I lie to my therapist, she thinks I’m getting better, when in reality, I have never felt more depressed in my life than I do right now. I have fantasies about slitting my wrists, or jumping in front […]
Its hard to put into words how much I truly hate every second of living on this earth. For reasons and forces unknown I wasn’t ever meant to be anything of value. my parents admit i was a mistake, not aborting me was an even bigger one. now im paying for their mistakes.
From kindergarten to highschool, I was always outcast. I was the kid that didn’t even get bullied because he was of lower social stature. which made no sense, I was nice. I always helped out and always tried to be a good friend. In all it was everybody’s fetish to use me for […]