Can someone talk with me on here? Like on this site? We can talk about whatever, i just want conversation i guess… Im going to try and talk, though im tired, and my brain isn’t working right (cause it just is, not cause im tired lol).
Tag:
talk
i love talking to people and listening to anything that’s going on.
text? 208-901-7161 🙂
kik? feel_alive
message me anytime 🙂
Why do I bother? Why the FUCK do I even try anymore? After spending a few days in the psych ward, I would have thought that things would be a little better. You are just as goddamn selfish and self-absorbed as you ever were! What if I HAD killed myself, you *****? What would you have done then?
Would you go to your goddamn aerobics class instead of going to my funeral? “That’s how life is, and you just have to get over it. Stop letting every little thing bother you. You’re just like your daddy, I can’t talk to you!”
Maybe because all you ever want […]
When I look in the mirror,
I don’t see me
I see failure and no beauty,
I see ugliness and sorrow
I used to be so happy
A bubbly joyful girl
I used to be excited for school and my friends
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Now I dread seeing myself
I fear breakfast and tea
I know my friends watch me
To make sure that I eat
They scan my arms everyday
Checking for new cuts
Their faces falling at the sight of crusted blood
I know they’re disappointed
I see it in their eyes
Some seem to understand
Some over-react
Some look disgusted when I show them the scars
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Long sleeve t-shirts are the new ‘in thing’ for me
Jeans with pockets to hide my fingers
Rough […]
“I’ll be here if you need someone to talk to.” No you won’t, you always ignore me.
“I care about you.” No, you only care about yourself.
“I know how you feel.” No, you don’t. I don’t even know how I feel.
“I’ll never hurt you.” Then why do you always tear me to pieces? Why am I the one to blame?
“Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem. It’s not worth it.” Oh yeah? Sometimes those problems aren’t so permanent. And it may not be worth it to you but I’m sick and fucking tired of being in so much pain, and not belonging anywhere. I hate waking up in […]
I’m running away from people again.
First time I didn’t have any friends. So it was ok if they didn’t talk to me since I didn’t talk to them.
This time I’ve met so many nice people, but I even catch myself saying  ‘I’m late, we’ll catch up later, right?’ and almost literally running.
I’m out of facebooks and whatsapp groups. I wait some hours or days to text someone back.
Inside, there is that famous phrase ‘help me!’ screaming in repeat. They even know I’m not fine and they want to talk, to make me feel better. So why do I run when I have […]
Baby I miss you. Why did you leave me? There is so much I want to tell you, to talk to you about.  I need you, I dont know what to do without you. My life is a dream now, constantly remembering the time we were together. And you were right, the problem is me…I’m sorry baby.
Stopped going to my therapist. Too weird to talk about feelings and getting told to find my inner cuddly-ness. That doesn’t exist.
Hello,
Unlike most people here my situation is not critical…
I have no friends, But not because of my personality or anything, I just dont talk to people alot, I’m affraid to talk to people. So most of my days I’m sitting here, alone, listening to the radio or watching TV. Nobody Called me for christmas or my birthday…
As for “suicide” well, I’ve been thinking about it for a good year or so.
Everynight it was “Should I do it ?” And of course, I ended up falling asleep, Or I decided not to do it.
I actually “wanna Die” because I think it’ll be easier than to have […]
Ignore me like disease
A ghost you choose not to see
Pretend I’m not there because
Shortly I won’t be
Maybe you thought I was stronger
That I could live through it
That the lies you spoke no longer linger
And instead I found peace
But you’re wrong, dead wrong
I’m just better at hiding it
The pain you put me through
Gave me much needed guidance
Trust no one
Believe in nothing
And the day will soon come
Where you feel nothing
No pain, no hurt, no sorrow
Maybe emptiness is a better way of living
Keep my heart beating is all you asked […]
My family is …
Yesterday I heard my parents discussing, they were in their room and the door was closed (they talk so loud I can hear miles away), my father confessed he was cheating my mother.She is so stupid and people tell her harsh words everytime and she never does anything about it, she’s 45, how long will she bear everything in silence?.I don’t even know why they’re still married, but I’m sure they’re not in love anymore, plus my father is always getting into trouble and hurting other people’s feelings.He has been had struggles with alcohol and smoking since they married more than […]
When you know how hard it is to drag yourself out of bed in the morning, then we can talk.
When you know how hard it is to even keep breathing, when all you want to do is stop, then we can talk.
When you know how hard it is to believe that life will never get better no matter what you do, then we can talk.
But right now, all I hear is noise.
You’re not supposed to want things, because wanting makes you miserable.
Yet if you don’t want, you have no ambition. You can’t change a given thing unless you want it changed…
Me, I want but I don’t know how to achieve. I feel stuck. So very stuck. Wanting makes me unhappy because I can’t have what I want. I can’t do enough and be enough to get what I want.
And if I don’t want I will still be miserable, unless I accept of course but wouldn’t that be resigning? I just can’t accept things. The guilt is too much.
I’m so confused.
Is it ok to want things or […]
I always thought of changing my life style and everything, before beginning of something big like college, job. I tired my best to fit in to there college lifestyle, I did make a lot of friends i was happy but after few weeks something happened i don’t know what all of a sudden everyone started to think of my as clown, Started picking on me but i didn’t say a word against them and that made things even worse, which made me talk of the town literally as i live in a town. you see the same faces everyday. which gave people the opportunity to talk shit behind my back. I can fell […]
The last memories
He made the excuses
It was his choice; he sent the second message only cause he was going through the same as I was in a way. I just thought he never listened what I had told him. The third message he was right to think of me as a bad guy and after the second message, he stopped caring. The forth message, I confessed, I told him the truth, even though I knew I shouldn’t have. I told him a lie as well just because i was desperate for the truth from him. He never told me anything, I just wanted him to […]
everyday its the same routine. waking up thinking its a new day but then suddenly everything reminds how much of a fuckup you really are. And school doesnt make it any better. makes it worse actually. ive tried to pick myself up but eventually when i get home i dont eat or talk but go to my room And cry myself to sleep.
Its been over 3 months since the last time I saw the person I am in love with. I have not tried to talk to him or anything. There are days I would give anything to hold him one more time. But I don’t contact him because I know he wont talk to me, things ended pretty bad between us. I just wish there was a way to tell him how much I miss him without talking to him
There is black hole that lives inside me.
It slowly takes away everything. It slowly got bigger and bigger and I feel emptier and emptier. I can feel it crushing my bones, pushing and squeezing my organs.
I don’t remember how I got infected or if it was always there. But now I am filled with emptiness. I know what happiness is, I understand it and I know I will never feel it. There is nothing in this world that I want or that could stop my black hole from devouring me.
I only remember a routine I am suppose to follow to fit in […]
I’ve been struggling for so long now. The depression started at age 13 and never ceases. At age 17 I attempted suicide and after nearly needing a liver transplant, I survived. I committed to give it several more years to see if it gets better. It doesn’t.
My life is easier than 99% of the world. I wish I could take my life and let a North Korean have my opportunity. I’m fairly good looking, smart, and athletic; but I never cease wishing I were dead. I know I was happy as a kid, but I can’t really remember it. It’s been so long. Many people […]
Contemplating suicide for the longest time, but the more I live, the more I yearn to die. Being human just sucks! If I were young, everyone would be concerned and talk me out of it right? But I am a senior. Now, you are not concerned and don’t give a damn right?
I am currently cleaning house. Purging my belongings. No one notices. No one cares. Good.