“What’s up?”
“… Nothing.”
I had to steady myself before replying. Thankfully my voice comes out normal and calm. I don’t want anyone to know about it.
I calmly walk to my room, collapse on the floor, lean against the door and just cry.
I’m selfish. Stupid. Arrogant. A waste of money. A waste of time. A waste of energy. Fat. Lazy. Ugly.
Sink down, lying on floor.
Gay. Retard. ******. Dirty. Liar.
Even if I did leave, there would still be those at school who would just laugh at me.
Lol. She’s such an emo.
I’ve been crying to the point that it hurts […]
Tag:
Waste Of Energy
I don’t even know why I try, I always fail. It’s always a waste of time, a waste of energy, a waste of love. Noone ever loves me the way I love them. Noone ever really cares. This time it’s too much, it’s too painful and the wounds aren’t healing. The only way I know to be at peace and not hurt is to die. My tyme for freedom is coming soon.
But I don’t think there’s a good way for me to go on living. I feel horrible all of the time. I’ve seen enough doctors, therapists, and social workers to populate a small country. I don’t see any future for me. I don’t even have any dreams to hang on to. I don’t have any friends either. I’ve spent two weeks in the hospital. It made things worse.
It is sad when happy people die; if only we could trade places so that they could go on living.
I’m young. I hate it when older people complain that my generation feels entitled to more than we deserve. […]
I hate who I am. What I have become. I see nothing worth saving.
I am lazy. I am a whore. I am not worthy.
I don’t need anyone telling me that I am because If I don’t believe then those words are just a waste of energy.
If I could overdose without risking it not working I would. I’m so tired.