6 years ago • General
Apr 24, 2010 @ 10:01:10
They say the best people, the one’s who’ll make a difference, have the hardest lives. I believe that. I’ll admit, you have had a traumatizing life so far. But the fact that you’ve survived all of it, and fought back for your life.. is so inspirational. There’s hope for you yet, you just have to contact some extended family, someone who’ll take you in. Work through this, but please, not for me but for yourself, escape this lifestyle you live in. Only then, when you change your surroundings, can you do great things.
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Apr 24, 2010 @ 10:42:56
Thank so much for the advice. You have a way with words.
Apr 24, 2010 @ 11:01:39
Just remember, you’re always welcome here. And you’re never alone.
Apr 24, 2010 @ 16:46:44
Thank you. just for taken the time for me , you’ve helped me make it through another day.
Apr 24, 2010 @ 17:31:48
Hopefully you’re around to talk to for many more days.
Apr 24, 2010 @ 18:12:18
It takes great courage to post what you did. Thank you for sharing your life.
Apr 25, 2010 @ 04:39:24
Hey, first of all I want to say that you are very strong and courageous don’t ever forget that. Remember nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent. About the other ex and his gf that wasn’t supposed to be you. If anything it shows you that you are here for a reason. I can relate to you which is why I have so much respect for you for posting this, it’s not an easy thing to do. I understand what you mean about feeling like you need him I’ve been there too. But the thing is is that’s part of the mistreatment. By treating you the way he did he made it so you were dependent on him…but you’re not. I definately can relate to how you feel about nobody wanting “damaged goods” but trust me there is good men out there and you aren’t damaged goods. You’re a survivor! You don’t need anyone else’s approval. I know it’s hard but I really think you need to not have contact with him. You need to focus on you and learning to love yourself. If you respect yourself then others will respect you. You have had such a rough life but you can either let it ruin you or you can use it to your advantage to make you a stronger, better person. In the end YOU decide how you want to use your life experiences, nobody else. It’s all in perspective and how you decide to look at it. If you just focus on the negative you will only get negative feelings. I know it may seem hard to find anything positive but you can still have a positive future. It’s not too late. If you need anything I’m here
Apr 25, 2010 @ 16:28:29
hi my named is farrah i have a step mom and a dad and a mom but my mom lives in newyork never met me my dad never even care bout me. i have a life that everyone is against me i go to a school and i get straight A and everyone from my school makes fun of me. i have no friends except for one her named is bailey she the only one that support me. i treat her like if she was my angel she treat me like a angel she always is there for me and never makes me feel like if im some piece of trash. she always has good feelings that im gonna be something great in this life. i have a sister that in school she said to everyone my life and everyone makes fun of it. i never had someone that has been super awesome in my life like my friend bailey but this is what i hate bout my life everyone is against me but i just keep on until the end that i want to kill my self. my life is a piece of garbage nobody even understand me how i feel inside and outside.
Apr 29, 2010 @ 21:18:35
aneuheis, I just want to give you a great big hug… after I stop crying, of course. I guess it’s hard for me to accept that anyone can possibly care. I’ve been in the bed with the covers over my head for four days now. I can’t go on living like this… you’ve given me hope. I feel guilty for saying I wanna kill myself, after reading what you said. Can you tell me how to get motivated and get on with my life?
May 01, 2010 @ 15:21:00
Your story probably makes everybody cry. You have such courage my friend! I know it doesn’t feel like much but have you ever just logged onto facebook and made some new friends to talk to there? It helps me to just read what they’re doing today and see how they talk to their friends. It can take your mind off your own problems for awhile. If you are religious you could try joining a church in your town and making some new friends. Those people are always so eager to help someone like you. Miserypit.com is a place to talk about suicidal feelings with people who won’t judge you. Ask your therapist to recommend some ways to get out of your horrible life and start all over. You can do it my friend!! You just need some encouragement. Look at how many people care about you already just on this site! Take Care!!
May 01, 2010 @ 18:12:05
Thank you! I don’t know what to say today, I’m too fucking depressed, excuse my language. But my feelings haven’t really come out in a while, and I’m afraid of what I’ll do when I snap. The pain from my assault, you’d think I’d be getting better. I can hardly move. I need pain medication. I’m so lonely. I don’t trust anybody. I have this overwhelming fear somebody is out to get me, soon. Dust Devil, thank you for your encouragement. I’m sorry I’m acting this way. It really helped to read what u said! Will things get better? My mama always told me when I was younger, they don’t get better, they get worse. Well, remember she died. My daddy made her miserable til the day she died. And he had another woman, 3 wks or sooner, paying for her crack, and giving her my mama’s jewelry. I need to take a break for right now. Love u!!!
May 04, 2010 @ 15:45:26
When I get my nerve up, and if anybody is interested, I want to tell the story of the night I was assaulted by my exboyfriend. I think/i know it will help me in the healing process. I need to tell the gory details.
May 04, 2010 @ 19:07:25
I know I might not be much help. Bit I would love to listen to your story.
May 04, 2010 @ 19:11:10
Thank you, you’ve already helped more than you know. Give me a little while, like I said, gotta get my nerve up.
May 04, 2010 @ 19:15:07
It’s okay. Unless I compleatly lose it and break down any worse than last night, I wont be going anywhere.
May 07, 2010 @ 03:07:40
Right now, I just wanna say I wish those guys had let him finish what he started. He had planned a murder/suicide. He beat me so hard with that lock in in hand, the lights when out. I actually thought someone had turned the lights out. He crushed my face/jaw on one side, the other side of my jaw is fractured. I’m losing my hearing in my left ear, not to mention all the other pains and aches, that weren’t addressed at the hospital. (I had called the hospital to make sure the law wouldn’t be involved, I actually had no intentions of going). But, anyway, I just remember this peace coming over me when he kept beating me to the ground… I kept smiling… even though I knew my teeth had been knocked out. I knew he was going to take my life. He promised me that. Luckily at this time, he didn’t have a gun, the first time I’ve ever known him not to have one. (Hell, he brought a Tech9 to kill my daddy when he was 18, he’s 30 now). There’s more to this story, and I’ll get back to it later if you’re interested, I just wanna know why I miss him and still love him, and he’s still the only one who can make me feel safe and secure? All this because I didn’t wanna live with him in his crackhouse, I wasn’t ready to marry him and have yet another baby I’d have to “kill” cause he’d say it wasn’t his. They were supposedly gonna get him for kidnapping, too. I asked my tarot cards one question yesterday, I try to leave them alone, because they are so accurate it’s scary. But I asked. is he gonna kidnap me when he gets out? The card said, and I compared notes with other books, “an unjust and untimely death…” He was wanting me to leave the country with him before all this happened. He gets out next year Nov 23rd. 23 is his lucky number, I’m obsessed with it, before all this happened I saw it everywhere, license plates, I’d look up, the clock would be 23 after, I changed the clock in my bedroom to a Roman numeral clock. One site, where other people are plagued by seeing the number 23, somebody said, it’s an omen of death. (Psalm 23)? Do you think I’m crazy? Or should I be preparing for this day. I think I should be. And I’ll be ready. I think it will be a relief. Btw, I survived another suicide attempt last night, I took so many pills, apparently I was one short. Thank you for reading, it helps to tell somebody these things, ya know? Please tell me what you think.
May 07, 2010 @ 03:15:05
You know, it would really help if I had female friends, or especially if my mama was alive. I have no family. To hell with them. I’m so alone. After all I’ve been through, do you think it can actually get better? Remember, I’m 37, no children, never married. I only have exboyfriends that call everyday to check on me. Thank God for that. They still love me and help me out and take me places, but I can’t help but wonder, is that healthy? I’m not ugly, obviously, I get “hollared” at every time I go somewhere, or approached my men wanting my phone number. But, I do want to be in love and settle down, problem is, I wish I had with him, then this would have never happened. I’m sick, I know.
Apr 16, 2014 @ 15:35:28
I’m not much but I’m here for you.
I can’t even begin to imagine what all you’ve been through, let alone understand it. But not only did you go through It, you made it. And girl, you made it for a reason. I know you’re sad, angry, confused, and miserable. But happiness is out there. And you are going to hunt it down, tackle it, and make it your bitch. I already know it.
Everyone has a purpose, and no matter how insignificant it may seem it’s so much more than it appears. I know, your purpose is going to be life changing.
Stay strong, and live on my friend.
Nov 29, 2014 @ 02:22:57
Your story made me cry… you are a really tough woman to stand ALL this shit. It has been four years now since your last answer… I want to know HOW and WHERE are you now ? We can exchange our emails and share our daily struggles. I most sincerely want to know what is happening with you, deep down, I will try honestly to understand your feelings.. I know how a simple sharing could relieve this torturing anxiety. How can I know that ? ..Well I am a HUMAN who is desperately dreaming of an infinite and heartwarming LOVE, to take care of another human and being taken care of, just like YOU.. just like every single human.
Aug 29, 2015 @ 06:05:35
Wow… That was a very heavy story.. You made it until so far and you are the kind of person I look up to! And please don’t think “Why would you look up to me?” because I look up to grown ups. And I especially look up to grown ups who have been through a hard time/hard times but made it out alive. Sharing your story was very brave. Hope you’ll recieve lots of love in your life
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