Can’t people see the pain that we’re in? I don’t know about some of you but I just can’t stop crying. I’ll be on the train or on the bus or even sometimes in a lecture and I’ll just cry. And it feels like no one can see me or the pain.
I try and protect my mum from knowing what I’m  going through but shouldn’t she be able to tell that a little bit of me is dying everyday when I make the effort to get out of bed? And why is it when you ask for help, no one is willing to help you? I think its kind of tragic that society has become this mess.
12 comments
I don’t know what to say other than, I’m sorry. I feel the same way. I struggle to get out of bed each morning and give life another chance, only to get frustrated with money and people. Unless you can trick yourself into caring, I don’t know if it’s worth trying.
People can see, but they just don’t care. If they’ve never felt the pain themselves, there’s no way they can understand it in us, so they just disconnect. That’s why, 9 times out of 10, the only help you’ll get is from people who have suffered through the same sort of thing, like the people here or on other suicide support groups. The problem is that we’re all in the same sinking boat so I’m not sure how much help we can be to each other. But as far as getting help/compassion from those on the outside, it’s a lost cause. I wish that wasn’t the case. But like you said, society (governed by “normal” people) is a complete mess.
I have to say its quite disappointing. I think that society is blind to the problems they don’t want to admit is going on. I feel that it takes easily over an hour just to get out of bed each day to go back to it a few hours later. There is something kind of safe about it.
Scooby- I have to agree, whilst this is a great group for finding people who understand, I doubt that we really help each other get out the sinking boat. :/
sadgirl25
So your family live in the UK and you are alone in another country?
I agree society is fake,it’s all about money,status and all materialistic things.Ordinary people don’t seem to matter that much and people are too busy with their own lives to help anyone else;it’s a matter of help yourself or drown
I have also noticed this to be true. Although I stay pretty upbeat these days, the other weekend I went into the grocery store crying and no one even noticed! No one asked what was wrong or even seemed to care. While I really didn’t feel like talking about what was going on, it never ceases to amaze me at how blind the world really is.
I don’t think people are born immune to the pain of others: I think they make themselves that way after years of work. They tell themselves that they can do nothing because that is what they’ve been taught and that is what is easiest, so they choose to blind themselves to the pain of others and only care about themselves. Little do they realize how much a kind word or a pat on the shoulder can do for someone who is honestly in pain…
n o o m- My family lives in Malaysia and I live in Australia (unwillingly) but originally from the UK. I agree, whilst some things in society are tolerable, there are some that I can’t stand! Why are people so concerned with materialistic belongings and finances? Isn’t there more to “life” than how much money is in your bank account? I’d like to imagine that a happy life would include being surrounded by the people you love and having good health. I feel like a minority for having this idealistic view.
anne4me-Honestly, if one person saw me crying and told me everything would be ok or such a comment, I would feel like a little bit of faith has been restored in society. Instead people see tears flowing down my face and look the other way and pretend they don’t see it. Congratulations on feeling mostly upbeat 🙂
Sadgirl25-I think it’s time that you and I step out and change the world for the better. I was reading the book “Out Live Your Life” (Christian…that maybe a turn off, I don’t know), and it talks about how we as a society have learned to close our “shells” and ignore the suffering of others. From here on, I want to actively search out people who are hurting and try to make their lives better. No longer do I want to be part of the crowd that turns their heads and ignores the hurting. Even if people ignore me, the next time I go to the grocery store and see someone crying, I’m going to pay attention to them!
I share your idea of a happy life where you’re surrounded by people you love and that love you. It wouldn’t even have to be people that we’re related to…just people that care.
Btw, have you all heard the story about the man who killed himself but said in his suicide note that he wouldn’t do it if one person would smile at him that day?
I wish that we really could change the world 🙂 I’d like to start with being able to change something at the very least, or at least if i listened to one persons concern then I actually made a difference and I’m not here just to have a losing battle with depression! If I make it through this, I actually want to become a clinical psychologist, but at the moment, its a pretty big if. I’ve set myself a date, a sort of ultimatum to myself in which if something hasn’t improved in my life then I’m just going to stop fighting.
(Don’t worry about the Christian book, I’m not religious but I envy people who are because they have faith. I can’t find the strength in myself to believe)
Its a good job that it doesn’t matter about relatives, I only have my mum and my aunt who actually care about me, but your friends are your chosen family.
I haven’t heard about that man, but I can really empathise with him! I dont have any friends here and I have no family either and if one person at my university made the effort to actually become my friend (its not for a lack of trying on my half), I wonder if I’d feel this way?
I’m going to do my part to change the world. If I can start working regular hours (I’ve been a little bit of a slacker here lately!), then I want to start sponsoring a child through something like Compassion International. It’s only $38 (USA dollars) a month so, if I cut out drinking sodas so much, I should have plenty. While it may sound small, I think something like that would be a step in the right direction for me 🙂
Don’t stop fighting! It sounds like you really have a lot to offer the world and I think you would be a great psychologist. We need more people who can actually understand people’s problems because of their own experiences!
Haha, don’t envy me! Every day I wake up and choose to believe. Sometimes it’s easier than others. If I have faith, it’s thanks to God — I definitely don’t deserve much credit on my part!
Are there any other kids in your university who seem to be kind of outsiders, who don’t fit in with the others?
Hey sadgirl25 & anne4me, that’s a great attitude… change the world. We may be the minority, but it’s my opinion that we have 100x more passion than the ordinary chumps who can’t understand. If only we can convert this passion (pain, depression, anger, etc) into a productive force, the world would have a major, much-needed revolution on its hands.
I’m doing my best to change my little corner of the world. Who knows, maybe I’m making a difference, maybe not. (Some days I feel like I’m doing more harm than good.) But I have to try. If you can’t fit into “their” rules, you either change the rules or get out of the game.
I hear ya about lack of faith. I really envy those who have a spiritual connection with the world, whether it’s through religion, love or hope. Unfortunately I was born without that ability no matter how hard I try. Maybe you’re the same. So I guess we have to rely on rationality. The rationale being: if you are still alive, breathing & have most of your body parts intact, you can still serve a purpose.
Well I’m a lousy cheerleader, but I hope you get the general optimism I’m trying to convey… FIGHT.
Every word you typed, is how I feel! But I’ve realized that’s just the way people are- they’re almost always selfish and they mostly care about themselves… at least everyone I know has been that way.
Well anyway I want you to know I care about you! & it makes me sad to know you cry that much. 🙁 I’ll always be here.
@sadgirl25
I am surprised to read that you have experienced that. I cannot imagine how people can see someone crying and not ask if he/she is alright.
If someone does not care or looks elsewhere, he is a despicable useless human being.
If I see someone crying, whether he is an old man or a young girl, my heart goes to pieces and by no means would I ignore that. I cannot imagine anything more rewarding to the inner of the person than being able to restore a persons hopes or state of happiness.