I wanna disappear!!

It’s gotten way to far now to the point where I just wanna end it.
I hate growing up!! It’s the worst thing ever!!
The people around me change and I’m left alone.
I feel alone. But I’m not. I have people around me
that love me. I cut myself cause I have no idea how to deal
with it. My friends party almost every weekend and I go with them…
It’s just I feel out of it.. I’m not as pretty as them at all
I’m not like them at all and I like that it’s just annoying and sad.
It’s makes me wanna cry because I’m not attractive and i feel like
I don’t even know anymore. It’s jus so fuck’n annoyin.
I’ve tried starving myself but it doesn’t make me feel better so I don’t Try anymore. I just want somebody to love me I guess…
It’s not even hard..