A painful life

I was 12 when my fathr died and 20 when my mum as well, Working in a school I look after my little brother, I love someone and get civil marriage making 6 years from now but we still live separately until religious ceremony, he is a nicve person but never take decision he never care and don’t even mind with anythings. I got in love with a boy who is a cousin of mind I havn’t left my husband waiting to choose the better i don’t retain any private relationship with him or my husband.But the second one makwe my life a hell, He hits me, hurt me, betrave me and he’s always angry with me when he got problem with other people he’s much aggressive and hurt me, many marks on my hand and body. Am afraid of him and the worst he like many women together. I want to leave him but always he told me that he will kill me or hit me infront of people or at my work.This could be very shameless for me. I know he will do it as he always hit me even in the car or on the street. I want to die but I have my little brother who have exams and I don’t want him to be destroyed as we are alone and I look after him since my parents death.