Me, I’m scared. I’m still a young little girl and I’m going threw things I wish I wasn’t. To adults, they think its my fault. I’m starting to think maybe it is. Its ME who is struggling ,I make myself struggle. I try to “Love” but there is no love for any young girl. Theres only lust. And if you have love, your a lucky son of a *****. I want to feel love. because everyone I date I say I’m in love but I’m n0t. Could it be that I just started dating?. I struggle with pain, anger, sadness and more .  But why, why me. I’m SCARED to know why. but I NEED to know why. I wish I could know. and I wish I wasn’t so scared.
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It’s ok. If you are a person who’s naturally emotional, such as myself, it’s very easy to fall in love. I have a close friend who, like you, is a young female that keeps falling in love over and over with these guys that claim to love her, but are just lusting after her. It saddens me to see her torture herself in such a way, to see her with deeper and deeper cuts on her arms on each of our meetings (I live away from home, and meet up with her whenever I’m back). I’ve told her before what I tell you now: it hurts to be without love, but it hurts more to be in a relationship where your love for them in not reciprocated. I’m lucky that I have experienced love, and I can say now that it is worth the wait and the pain that comes from being alone.
Maybe when my friend notices how much I care for her I’ll get my time to not be alone 🙂
You want connection. You are healthy and naturally want that as you are human, it is our most basic of all needs.
is there some other kind of connection you can make? Immerse yourself in a group. Get as many hugs as you can. Ask someone to comb your hair slowly. Get a massage. Instead of devouring the idea of love try to grow it in many tiny ways first.
You are right about folks who are born into love being luckier than they usually know.
You say son of a ***** so youve got some fight in you. You are not wrong to want what you want just may be getting it in the wrong ways that don’t work for you.
What are you scared of? Envision that and then envision what would that scary thing happening mean…where would it lead? How about we set up hug clinics where folks like us can go for a cup of tea served with a blanket and a hug or three?