I’ve been sick this week, with the worst sore throat I’ve ever had. I’ve been using it as an excuse not to talk to people, which makes them less likely to talk to me. I haven’t said more than is absolutely required of me (mostly ‘yes’ ‘no’ and ‘I’m fine’) since Monday. And it feels fucking good. No one questions me. It’s easy. Just don’t speak, and no one will want you to.
It’s the same with eating, I’ve decided. All week I’ve barely eaten a thing (my anorexia is doing cartwheels) and I’m not hungry at all. Don’t start, and there’s no need to continue.
I think I’ll apply this theory in all aspects of my life. It’ll make things considerably easier. I’m too tired of people having things to ask of me. If I just shut myself in, there’s nothing they can expect me to do.
5 comments
Not speaking makes you understand that speaking is not that necessary, right? It feels great!
About eating, okay, don’t eat too much but please eat as much as your body needs. Losing health is not fun at all.
I hear you. It is so spooky how exactly alike we are. I will tell my story briefly on it.
Speaking – I have taken this to an extreme. I literally can go weeks without saying a word to anyone. I isolate myself, have no friends and very alone. That is the bad thing, but I really do not have anything to say to anybody anymore. I do have to go back to “normal” working hours next week, but if I look down and say nothing, nobody says anything to me anyway.
Eating – also the same, eat very rarely, a few times a week only and never more than once a day.
I shut myself in to an extreme level and it is easier that way, but it is very lonely too. Can you cope with loneliness?
@dunkelheit, not eating is what I do. It’s how I get through the day with an ounce of sanity. That, and I have 1 month left to get to my goal weight, so…
@Everlasting, lonliness? It’s been my best friend since I realized every family member I have is a stupid pig. I never really talk to anyone anyway, just basic small talk and then we leave eachother alone to do whatever it is we do. This is just saving everyone the time and stupidity of acting like we have anything worth saying.
Are you sure you won’t find yourself fainted or starving?
Your cells may not be on the same wavelength as you.
I never have, no. I have too much fucking fat still available to burn.