The funny thing about the little things in life for me is that those bad little things can make me really upset or angry and ruin my whole day but the good little things never make me happy. Why is it so much easier to get upset? Why is it hard to be happy? Why don’t I feel happy? Does anyone else feel this way too?
I don’t want to feel nothing but anger and frustration anymore…
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I know what you mean… The bad always over powers the good; ’cause it seems like you can’t even feel the good.
That’s exactly it. The bad always feels worse and more overpowering than the good.
Yeah. Makes me feel like a burden on everyone :/
I felt the same way too. I still kind of do.
It’s hard to see that people care.
Our minds play this little trick on us.
The mind loves to revel in the negative, the mind identifies with the negative side of our lives and creates a self fulfilling cycle of pain.
We are triggered by small negatives and they escalate into bigger problems.
Eventually we are trapped behind what I call
the Black Velvet Curtain
It’s a choice – a mindset. It starts with waking up – if you wake up and say “I feel like crap, today sucks” – you will view everything that happens negatively and use it bolster your crappy day hypothesis … even relatively decent things won’t be “good enough”
Conversely, if you wake up saying “today will be great!” then you start viewing everything through a more positive lens and when thing that are not so good you say “meh – it’s no big deal”
the key is – you have to believe what you say … waking up is a new day – every day so it brings new experiences … don’t start your day with a pile of crap from yesterday.
example: I have a dog (surprise) … it’s a foster dog, it was neglected and abused and had very little human contact – most of it negative. The dog is very fearful and skittish and barks at just about everything … the dog barking wakes me up at least twice every night. I also have a roommate … the barking annoys us both … when the dog barks my roommate gets angry and yells at dog to shut up … I hear the dog bark and i ask “what are you barking at?” – every time … about 50-60% of the time, the dog has a bona fide reason to bark (someone at the door, car door slam next door, on of the other dogs barks first, etc) … my roommate doesn’t care, he gets upset EVERY TIME …
The moral? You will be 50% less angry/annoyed of you ask why the offending source is executing the annoying action.
This line of questioning works for everything … someone cuts you off it traffic? maybe the guy got a call that his kid is sick or in the hospital … the bus is late? maybe it had a flat … bottom line is those little annoying things that people do you can react one of two ways – positive or negative – and how you react determines how you feel
the guy cuts you off in traffic – you can say “he’s an inconsiderate ass!” and you will be angry/irritated and go o school/work bitching about “that asshole” OR if you give the guy an “excuse” like “maybe his kid is sick and he’ going to get her in a hurry so he’s not late for work” – it becomes somewhat forgivable and in a few minutes all is forgotten (or at least forgiven) and you go on about your day without carting around pointless anger and frustration.
rubiks dawg