My family hates me, they always tell me they do. I hate how i remember it when i was little, how happy we all were. Now look, im scared to go home. I hate the people i should love. It drives me insane, how my own father can scream at me ” aww you going to cry, GOOD, now you can go f*ckin cut yourself!!!” I feel numb. From all this stress and pain. It makes me wanna die, makes me think they are better off without me. I know my mom is, she already left me here. My dad already wants to. I should just die. I want to die. I can only hold on for so much longer til i break…..I need help, i need someone to talk to since i have no REAL Â family. But instead i have NO ONE. Â I am hated at school since im to different. Im hated at home since im a monster. These people who hate me dont even know who i am. My own mom doesnt even know me. No one does, since no one will take the time to even give me a chance, Thats why i have all these cuts on my arm. Even tho i have tried to stop…i cant…
2 comments
Hi Skully, Sorry to hear about your pain. You are still young tho, i know home life isn’t always the greatest i had a horrific home life growing up. i left home before my 16th birthday and lived on the streets here. I do have to say it wasn’t pretty at -40 but it was much better than living at home in the homicidal hell hole i was living in. I mean sure that worked out for me, i got my life on track, forgot about my crackwhore mother and moved on. Life got better in some aspects of things but in others they got worse, i’ve tried to end it more times than anybody needs to know but i’m still here. why am i still here? i wonder constantly. This world and society is so corrupt but yet we are forced to live in it. Maybe one day we will all see our purpase and find out it’s not such a waste of time being here. i’m doubtful but hey you never know. being a little hopeful can be good aswell. Think positive, be strong and hold your head high. Most of all, forget about what anybody else thinks about you. let them talk there smack about you. hold yourself together because all they are trying to do is break you. dont let them. if you ever need to talk i’m here to lend an ear. take care
LB
I know, many people dont have patience. i’m one of them lol. I’ve just learned to accept what i cannot change even tho i do keep trying to end it for me. i know my day is coming again soon so try, just got to plan just in case.