Cold Summer-2

Its happening again. can someone help me. I feel that peak, that moment approaching again. but this time the decision has already been made. I wont be brought to that point again and not go through with it. I will ignore any signals this time because those signals will be like the ones from b4- a fake illusions to buy time for right now. Im very sad…very dark…i dont want nothing but a solution as to how to do this quietly and quickly. I want to plan it properly. Start a fight or some reason for me to be gone for a few days, I dont want him to know right away. Laugh? Ok. Blast ? ok Expose? even more reason. secrets arent safe anymore. loyalty has been replaced with fake promises and impulsive decisions. decisions that cant be changed. now u bbm n everything is going as planned and everything is on schedule and we’re great. theres not a single worry in the air. but im sorry- now is my turn to be fake eventhough this is the realest uve ever been. i speak only to you because your the only person who knows my existence. ive been off the grid for 68months-69 this july-end. and now im about to be off even your king.

who can help me do this right. i dont want to just talk about it i want to do it completely and the right way. im not guna jump n rush it i need to make sure things r in order first. i will set a date soon. This isnt a cry for help, this is a cry for assistance. my mind is made up. you dont get it anymore. but you will. and then a lil while after that, youll forget me. i always did what i could. i always did what i cud manage. i tried.