I’m not worried about how I’m going to do it. Or where I’m going to do it.
I just wish I knew what to do with all my stuff. My dog. My cat. I’m thinking about putting it in boxes, and maybe dropping them off at the humane society. I can’t help feeling extremely guilty but I feel like I’m having a negative impact on my dog. I’m sad because the humane society is such a shitty place, but I can’t burden my parents with him. I just want it all to be on my tab, and something that no one will have to worry about it. I also don’t want my roommates to suspect anything.
I’m sad because then they’ll have to move all my shit. I guess I could move it myself and get rid of it all. I don’t know. The furniture here is mine too so I could just give it to them. But then I’m the leaseholder so if I’m gone, I don’t know what will happen to them. I know this all sounds very selfish now, but I can’t take it. I can’t stand fake-smiling any longer or pretending that I’m not sad about all my responsibilities. I feel like I should leave a note on the fridge. Or something…
Does anyone else think about this? About what’s going to happen? About burdening other people with their garbage?
I wish my dog could make me happy. He used to make me laugh all the time. Now I just cry all the time like I used to… and I don’t know why. I just wish I was dead, constantly and most of what’s stopping me is worrying about all my shit, and the money it’s going to cost. I could leave the money out or something with a note.
Fuck, I wish I didn’t keep everything. I have so much garbage.
7 comments
The physical burden is little compared to the mental one that’s left behind when someone dies. maybe should focus more on note and less on furniture?
Your pets, if you give them away, for the love of god, don’t take them to a shelter. Take them to someone who will love them LOVE THEM and cherish them. As for furniture, I don’t think you have to worry about it. As for lease or whatever, Whatever money you have left you can always right down to use it towards the lease or to pay off whatever debts you have.
But listen to me. Hug you pets more. Although they don’t make you laugh as much as they used to, it could be because they’re getting older. Walk with them sometime. Just sit and hug them when they will sit with you. Watch movies together or something. Pets are bigger lifesavers than a lot of humans.
I think about about the burdens often too
I’ll take your pets! Like.. I’m not joking.. Don’t give them to a shelter or someplace like that.. But I’m completely serious about the pets.. There’s a good home here, I’ve got a dog and four cats haha. And if you want to talk about anything you can just email me if ya want to.
mychemicalromance3268@gmail.com
Just play with them. Think about why they used to make you happy and recreate it. Don’t worry so much about the stuff,,, if it was important to you then make sure it is taken someplace where it will be important to someone else. I think you should wait though. My friend is on here and a comment you made on her posts really helped her. She cried so hard because someone she didn’t even know cared enough to say something like that to her. PLease stick around. Try to be happy. You can always talk to me, in fact i would love to hear from you and to talk about life. My email is bellacarino896@gmail.com. You are important. Im here for you
Thank you. I love my dog and cat very much. I adopted them both from shelters and it would hurt to see them go back. My dog especially was very unhappy there and he needs a lot of attention and love. I should give them more quality time with me; I’m being so unfair staying here and shutting the door on him. We used to spend all day together on the couch, napping and watching tv.
I had three cats and i did the same thing. When one of them was poisened by our neighbor, the other two and i were really depressed. But we were always together and little by little things would start happening that would make me smile, they would wrestle or lay on either side of me..it took time, a long time, but it got better. And if you want to talk, ever, the offer will always stand.