17 and pregnant

To the original poster (excuse me if I don’t want to sort out the forum name you’ve chosen :P):

I don’t have a lot of time to spend here right now, (I just popped all my sleep meds and I’m getting loopy) but I wanted to hop in and say that I think it’s very courageous to decide to have the baby. The thing people often forget about abortion is that it’s not a “get out of jail free” card that comes with no consequences. There are support groups for people who have had abortions for a reason. Sometimes people are overcome with guilt after the procedure.

With that said, it remains your choice. In the end if you decide you can’t afford to raise the baby or just aren’t ready, you can always give it up for adoption. You have options either way.

One thing you should understand is that being a single mom at 17 will be infinitely harder than you can imagine. You’ll need support from those around you to help carry the burden, as that first year of a babies life is just going to be really shocking for you. They’ve measured a baby’s cry at the same decibel as a chainsaw and you’re going to lose a lot of sleep. It’s not going to be a lot of fun till the baby gets a little older. If you’re not ready for that, you may want to think about some other options.

In terms of you losing your boyfriend, I’m very sorry about that. Love really, really, really hurts when it goes wrong. The good news is that you know you’re capable of being loved because, well, you have a baby in you. The bad news is that guy wasn’t right for you, and now it hurts like a *****. Take some time to heal before pursuing relationships again. You’ve heard of the term “rebound”, and rebounding just doesn’t work. Get yourself emotionally well, then look for someone to jump inside your heart once you’re ready. Some of people’s biggest mistakes come from right after they’ve broken up with someone.

Also, learn to identify the things you didn’t like about this last guy, and avoid people with the same problems. Don’t shell out your body for men so easily because they’ll just use it an lose it. Look for a man that treats you respectfully, not someone who sees you as means to an end. When you’re young and hormones are racing, it’s pretty easy to just go after what guy looks exciting as opposed to guy looks stable. The truth is very few high school relationships actually continue after high school. Most break up. Instead of trying to find the man of your dreams in high school, spend more time focusing on learning about what you do and don’t’ like in a guy. When you’re mature enough to have a legitimate relationship, you’ll know what you’re looking for.

I have to sleep, my meds are making it very hard to see thigns. Take care OP.