About 3/4 Months ago my my girlfriend of the time got pregnant (it was mine) and we had an abortion. We decided that we we were too young and as we were both starting careers we decided it was the better thing (or this is what we told ourselves afterwards). The truth is there was no discussion, when she found it she text me to say she was pregnant then next thing i know she was on her way to the doctor and had started proceedings. After the abortion we kind of stopped talking like we used to and became really depressed, we stopped having sex (understandable) but also stopped hugging and kissing and holding hands and in the end she broke up with me.
Ever since i have been really depressed! I have been struggling to sleep, I have had no motivation to do anything outside of work because i’m always so tired and just think about killing myself all the time! My work is going down hill as I can’t concentrate and to top it all off, because i’m always sitting in my room alone, not speaking to anyone and not eating, i am causing a lot of tension at home and causing a lot of fights in the family!!
We have been broken up for around 3 months now and we are keeping in touch and we remain friends, as far as my feelings for her now, I just see her as my friend now and accept we are not together.
I used to see a future, i used to look forward to the future. There is no future for me now! I turn to drink every night to drown my sorrows! I walk across a bridge every night and contemplate jumping off, i don’t know why i haven’t done it. I feel like jumping every day! But when i get to the bridge the thought of actually jumping and looking over the edge calms me, makes me peaceful!
Boots
18 comments
..that’s no reason to kill yourself. you don’t need someone to make yourself happy. be happy first before you can make someone else happy.
Abortion is wrong. So wrong. Y’all took someone else’s life. That child deserved to live! You could’ve put it up for adoption at least. But what’s done is done, you gotta move on. Maybe have a kid in the future & just forget the past. Stay Strong
Shady… Fuck you! You cocksuckin Fuck!
Shady you can’t tell someone that it’s wrong.everyone has a right to do what they want. And he didn’t she did. I know what it’s like to be forced into the path of abortion where I had no say.
Besides, what’s done is done, you can dwell on what could have been. By I’d advise you not to as it will drive you insane. I know it’s hard but try to destracted yourself.
She’s just expressing how SHE feels about this. You can’t express your own opinions here? What happened to freedom of speach? We grow up being taught to speak our minds, then get judged for saying how we feel. Hypocrisy at its finest.
He’s obviously going through a hard time. And shady is making it worse. There is a fine line between sharing an interesting opinion and hurting someone !
Everything that shady has said here has not been helpful, or kind, or understanding.
Its all just telling boots that what his girlfriend did was ‘wrong’ when it’s not ! It’s just a choice that she made and that boots has a hard time living with.
Boots: I’m really sorry that your feeling like this. It’s a hard thing to go through. I’m sorry x
s2419 – Cheers, That Cocksuckin fuck just pissed me off so had to just leave it before i smashed a window wi my laptop! That fuck!
We like the idea of having children because that idea is based on the rewards and not the hard work, stress and practicality of having them. It was a very difficult decision but one that had to be made together. If she didn’t want to then you can’t resent her for that. So many kids grow up in a single parent environment, that’s exactly how this could have turned out. You don’t know and you can’t force her to feel the same way. I think few people that have children regret having them regardless of whether or not they are planned. They find a way to survive. However, that does not prevent you from doing so when the time is right. Don’t dwell on events you can’t change and a future you could never have envisaged.
Duke: How are you doing ?
@ S2419
Miss me???
I haven’t been on here in over a week. That doesn’t mean my life has improved dramatically.
S2419 sorry i’m trollin duke.
What?
@duke I missed you 🙂 where have you been?
@ rathernot
I just decided that I should post on here less. I’m actually better off when I don’t. Irrespective of how crap life might be it’s still real whereas posting on here doesn’t achieve very much. If I could delete any record of having been on here I would because I didn’t get anything out of it.
@duke yeah true you might have not got anything out of it, but you have given people a lot of advice and you might have, and you might have even saved some lives. You should be proud of yourself you have done a great thing, even if it does seem like a waste of time.
I’m glad you have took a break and have made more time for yourself tho, you should focus on yourself more then on others, even if you do help others by being here I think you deserve to have time for yourself
@ rathernot
I doubt that and it’s been a long time since I put that kind of effort in. I’m not an idiot and I understand everything fully. I know that I’m always going to appeal to some less than others. That doesn’t bother me because I don’t care what anyone thinks. I maintain a friendship with S2914 on here because she was one of the few people that bothered to talk to me and I thought it was nice of her to continually make the time. I suppose you both see a different side to me because people only get what they give. People your age should not be finding sites like this. It’s a messed up world.
@duke if I never found this site i would have never found her, so in a way I guess I’m glad we are where we are. Yeah this world Is fucked up, but that’s not why I was depressed. And duke I really appreciate all of the advice you have given s2419, I really think that you are one of the main reasons she is going to get help, and it means so much to me for you to be there for her, thank you duke
And I think you are a great guy, I love to read your comments and your intelligence is very unique, I like it. You have been a great friend to me even if it seems like we never even talk to each other. You are one of the most sophisticated people on this site, and it’s always nice to see you here, I understand that this website might not always help you, so I think you should take a break whenever you need one.
Duke thanks for everything, I really mean it.
Duke: I have missed you !! I’ve been worried !!
Are you okk ??