Weird request, I know…
I’ve come to the end of my road, and now the only thing holding me back is a legal matter that should be over in a few months. The day it’s settled I can and will end my life. The question is how to endure the next few months where I have literally no point in being alive but to waste time? I don’t have enough energy or money to do anything productive with my last few days. Each day is a losing battle with the pain, both physical & emotional. So like my title says, I think I’ll start doing drugs.
Can anyone give me some tips on what to look for? I live near a big city so I’m sure I can find it. I don’t think I want anything hallucinogenic. I have enough trouble handling ghosts and flashbacks with a sober mind. What’s something that’ll put me in a numb state where I won’t feel much of anything?
7 comments
Weed would be the easiest thing to start with proably.
I hope that you know that when you’re using drugs while you’re feeling bad or depressed, or something in that way, that drugs will also make those feelings worse. By example when you are depressed and you use drugs, the drugs will usually make you feel more depressed. So please be aware of the risks that it maybe will only let you feel more depressed than without.
I agree, taking drugs are only a temporary relief. Having experienced feeling this way both on and off drugs, it is so much easier enduring it off them. My suggestion, if you choose to do what you want, it would be to just stay away from mixing downers. That’s what has brought on the worst feelings, in my opinion. Also if you are easily agitated or frightened, stay away from hallucinogens and uppers or you’ll go into some crazy paranoid episode. Trust.
-Maria_A
Do not do drugs. Please. The artificial happiness and calm will only last a short time and you will create even more problems that will make you want to die even more.
You could maybe look at what legal drugs you enjoy most:
If you like coffee and cigarettes, those are stimulants, so you might enjoy anything that speeds you up, e.g. coke or the like.
If you prefer beer, that’s a depressant, so you might like weed, or maybe antipsychotics or sleeping pills.
You’ve already ruled out hallucinogenics.
That said, if you have so little of your life left, you might enjoy it most by being fully lucid and “clean”. Maybe find some amazing people to hang out with, that can be a high in itself.
Good look, and take care. 🙂
Thanks for the advice & suggestions. I simply can’t handle sobriety any more. I feel like I have to do something… even a beer is better than sitting & clawing my skin. I feel like weed might do something for me. After all, it is prescribed for terminal patients, right?
As it stands I’m just taking sleeping pills. Cheap and over the counter. They knock me out but they make me really nervous and jumpy too. I just have to keep it together for a few months. Or not. Planning anything is so pointless.
If I had to pick one, I’d go with weed.