At night, it gets worse. I’m afraid to close my eyes because I know the pain will come flooding back. I just want to be numb. I’d rather feel nothing at all.
Oh well. I suppose I really have no choice, I need to sleep. I really appreciate all of you. I feel as though I can finally relate and talk openly about what I’m dealing with.
Goodnight.
2 comments
Yes, night is when the bad memories, violent scenes from movies and books (which I now avoid) swirl round and round and round. Ambien has saved my life. And there is a certain comfort in knowing there is something I can od on around even if I choose not to act on it today.
I agree. I used to take Lunesta every night because I’d wake up somewhere else in the house otherwise. I keep my depression meds next to my bed and, because they’re no good for making me feel better, I can use them as my way out if need be. I totally understand the comfort of knowing that you always have an escape aid close by.