Why

Nothing ever gets better no matter where I go. I try to make a good life for me and everyone just wants to abuse me. Whether its mentally or physically. I never to do anything to anyone and I just get shit on. I’m ready for it to be over. I want to die and never look back. I don’t care if I hurt people after I’m gone because I won’t see them hurt and I can’t get hurt either. I really try my best and I get pushed in the mud and rocks. When will it end and I can live happily. I just want to not have to fight and not have to cry myself to sleep at night to rest at all. Then I have night terrors and can’t sleep peacefully. So whether I’m awake or asleep I’m on guard. I don’t want to be afraid every minute of my life. Why is this my life.