Dammit i feel like crap im scared to admit it. Ive just contradicted the past things ive said…i always do. Im really so confused. Fuck the paion is just so harsh it makes me want to give up and just stop trying because its too painfull to do anything. I admit im feeling shitscared about my dr appt today yes its orrational but nonetheless it is there. My thoughts just dominate me togeat lengths.
I honesrly dont even know what im thinking or what i want. its fuckinghard to explain
i havent had anysleep tonite. No desire for it i take Dvantage of the peCefullnite. Goddamit it really sucks being me no fucking pleasure i just feel sick.
God just end it. Cwonstant mental torture. Mey thoughts are taking over . Help.
Im feeling suicidal right bow not that i would do it.i just wnt the pain gone.
Its terrible not knowing how to express how you feel.
Jusy thinking about all the terrible experiences i had and all of them yet to come. Im feeling like its not worth it. I just would rather be doing nothing in nothingness. No pain.
Im sick of the same shit everyday and knowing im too weak to change it.
Im sick of being bored with life i justwant to scream it out.
Im sick of talking im sick of thinking sick of breathing, chores, pain, people, worry, hiding, trying sck of not gettig whay i want sick of feeling like.shit sick of getting walked over am sick of it.