Tag:

Desire

Charles Baudelaire – The Desire for Annihilation (Le Goût du néant)

by Taf Taf 12/22/2018

written by Taf Taf

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(poème de Baudelaire en Anglais et en Français)

The Desire for Annihilation (translated by William Aggeler)

Dejected soul, once anxious for the strife,

Hope, whose spur fanned your ardor into flame,

No longer wishes to mount you! Lie down shamelessly,

Old horse who stumbles over every rut.

Resign yourself, my heart; sleep your brutish sleep.

Conquered, foundered spirit! For you, old jade,

Love has no more relish, no more than war;

Farewell then, songs of the brass and sighs of the flute!

Pleasure, tempt no more a dark, sullen heart!

Adorable spring has lost […]

12/22/2018 2 comments

Desire to Die

by DarkOvercast 4/21/2016

written by DarkOvercast

It’s like a taste in my mouth..
Yes a taste, very faint, but still there
I can just see myself. Released into space
Suffocating from the lack of oxygen
Just so peacefully dying
I don’t want to blink and be dead
No…I want to feel it…to feel it slowly slipping away

I have these day dreams, where I’m in Chernobyl..
Walking down the street wearing the uniform of one of the original fire men..helmet to boots…
Just walking the empty city like a zombie
Letting the radiation turn my skin pail, my veins showing like I’m some kind of junkie,
A Fox walks up and asks? […]

4/21/2016 2 comments

it will help

by givin' up? 4/20/2014

written by givin' up?

I’ve decided to start cocaine.

-on a point that im afraid of my own mind

4/20/2014 5 comments

death cant come soon enough

by tia 11/10/2013

written by tia

this may seem really weird, but im actually really excited to die. im counting down the seconds until i will have gone 10 days with out food or water. the only thing that i am kind of feeling iffy about is the fact that im goin to die fat. that really pisses me off big time. i dont know why, but i just really really want to die, it has become a lust, a desire, and an obsession.

11/10/2013 11 comments

Black Market Beliefs!!

by RealTalk30 9/29/2013

written by RealTalk30

Suicide can never be accepted in society, at least not the way I see it right now. Of course I’m talking about the American society, I’m sure other country’s could care less if their people commit suicide.

I want cannabis to be legal world wide, that would be a great day to see. I’d be growing as much I could. But for now, society won’t fully accept cannabis for what it is.

How come when we can’t accept something as a society, we try to change it to be more acceptable for everyone?

Lets say “Johnny” wants to kill himself. He’s got no family or […]

9/29/2013 36 comments

Variance

by clevername 9/25/2013

written by clevername

It just blows my mind, how so many people of all different walks of life, from all over the world, with fundamentally different and incompatible views/mindsets/perspectives/religions/etc. …

All find too much wrong with the world, too much wrong with life in this world, that they often feel they would rather just die, than continue living.

People say life is beautiful… but our world today is so ugly (arguably, primarily due to the people in it), that all kinds of different people who otherwise have nothing in common, are seeing so much wrong, with so many things, in so many ways, that a group of incompatible people has […]

9/25/2013 28 comments

confused and angry just want it all done

by gloomygirl1313 9/10/2013

written by gloomygirl1313

Im numb now… no not numb exactly…I have forgiven him all the shit that went down… an addiction is a nasty thing and he is seeking help. has a specialist who deals with the sexual addiction may be going to a inpatient facility for a while… I forgave him (mostly some days it is hard though to remember that) .. now it is just the life with him.. my life ..
Im not sure I want it any more.. not just the life with him but any life.. well obviously im on here it has been like that for a while.
but Im not […]

9/10/2013 1 comment

Before you make a final decision

by BrooklynBoxx 8/25/2013

written by BrooklynBoxx

To everyone who is thinking about killing them self tonight.

To everyone who is thinking about cutting them self tonight

To everyone who is thinking about throwing up tonight.

To everyone who is thinking about not eating tonight.

Please. Listen to me. I’m where you are. I’m young. I’m lost. I have no hope. No desire to keep going on.

But your reading this now aren’t you?

Please I know you see a light at the end of the tunnel, I’ve seen it my self for many years. I’m hear on this site because I’m trying to get closer to the light. I want to, deep down in side.

Live.

So please, fight […]

8/25/2013 0 comment

by why i dont no 8/24/2013

written by why i dont no

its seems everything i knew about the human race the people iâ€™m growing up with the people i look up to the ones that leer over me are all… i canâ€™t rely explain it to be honest its like there crossâ€™t between 2 faced and volatile or in the case of my peers just plane violent i look arrowed and everyone i know it seems purely sexually driven like its the only thing they want need desire is sex and frankly i think itâ€™s a bit floored coos if thatâ€™s all you can think of whatâ€™s the fucking Pont what do you think… pray tell […]

8/24/2013 6 comments

I’m scared

by Soprano 8/23/2013

written by Soprano

A few months ago I posted a story about my best friend who was close to the edge and how I desperately wanted to stop him doing the wrong thing because he just had so much to live for.Â Well aÂ lot of time has passed and he is still alive, I actually managed to stop him – but in doing so I put all of myself into what I can only crudely refer to as a mission and IÂ know now that I lost myself. I learnt toÂ think like a suicidal person, seeing theÂ triggers, the pain, the hurt, the desire to end the pain – mostly because […]

8/23/2013 0 comment

Slipping

by Starlove 8/21/2013

written by Starlove

I’m slipping back into depression. For the first time in months I deliberately took a razor to skin and edged it in. The familiar slice and twinge offered a precious moment free of the past that haunts me. It felt so GOOD. So tremendously good. My wrist is aching for a gash right now, but I can’t. My wrists are clean. Under my clothes isn’t so pure. It’s the only thing that offers freedom from pain, and I can only imagine that deeper cuts and a tub of warm water would offer all the more bliss. I can’t. I can’t kill myself, can’t and won’t. […]

8/21/2013 1 comment

forced to be social

by Moire 8/19/2013

written by Moire

The nature of my job requires me to be somewhat social. Â This is quite a contradiction in the sense that when my anxiety and depression are at their highest, my desire — and ability — to be social is at the lowest. Â I spent most of the day today at a family reunion. Â It was totally exhausting being social for so long. Â Today it’s back to work after too short of a summer, facing what already suggests will be a long, long school year. Â This week will be hard because I will be forced to be social with my co-workers, repeatedly, over and over, through […]

8/19/2013 7 comments

Scientific Mind.

by lifekilledthelifeinme 8/6/2013

written by lifekilledthelifeinme

I hate having a scientific mind, it’s like I can’t have a normal life because I’m thinking of things along the lines of “I feel like we are made of nothing, the whole concept of how we live life and how we sleep is unexplainably weird. We have eyes, mouths and ears.. We are walking limps.” It all sounds funny but it gives me this really nasty hopeless feeling. Trapped in my mind kinda thing. I wish I could think what normal people think but I’ve bypassed that mentality long ago. I’m living for my family and boyfriend in whom I love dearly. […]

8/6/2013 2 comments

by TheBlackArm 7/17/2013

written by TheBlackArm

I’ve been fighting off my own severe depression for 29 years, rather successfully, with an attitude that depression isn’t real, and thoughts about ending my life are just me being weak and unable to handle problems. But this tactic worked better when I was younger with opportunity ahead of me and the “my future will be bright” keeping me going; now that I’m 29, over educated and underemployed, fighting off depression with sheer will is becoming harder and harder, and the suicidal plans come easier and are more realistic and acceptable in my mind.
It’s less than day to day now; it’s hour to […]

7/17/2013 1 comment

Never enough rest

by kissnm10 7/9/2013

written by kissnm10

I really don’t want to have to do this. I don’t want to cause any devastation. I know that I don’t see why it would hurt anyone–I’m really nothing important. But I also know that death hurts people. It just does. No matter the nature of the relationship. People who you have never spoken to in your life will cry for you. It makes no sense to me at all. Perhaps, it scares them more than it saddens them? Makes them realize that they to are set to expire some day? I don’t know. But I’m just so tired, so exhausted in every way. I […]

7/9/2013 0 comment

Without me you’ve got it all

by OffWithHerHead 7/4/2013

written by OffWithHerHead

Dear Monster,

youâ€™ve broken my heart

run your teeth across my chest

and feasted on the sweet meat inside

Iâ€™m sending you the pieces, what is left

I must begin now, before the venom spreads

and paralyses me completely,

as good Monster venom should.

I must look under my bed and inside the closet and

beg it was all a dream…

Iâ€™ve got no fight in me, no desire; oh please make it go awayâ€¦

7/4/2013 2 comments

First Post

by TickTock 6/28/2013

written by TickTock

As I see it there are three things preventing us from leaving this horrid planet:

1. The survival instinct. It’s hard wired into our brains from millions of years of evolution, and I think we all know, whether we have attempted or not, how powerful it is.

2. The values that have been bread into us since birth. We live in a world of mental slavery. A small number of insanely wealthy and powerful people control thge rest of the population, using them to maintain their power and wealth. Yet they don’t do this with chains, whips, and dogs. Instead, bread into us since birth are the […]

6/28/2013 12 comments

God knows I can do it

by mysmilecoversalot :) 6/25/2013

written by mysmilecoversalot :)

Last night was really scary. Iâ€™m 18, Iâ€™ve had suicidal thoughts off and on for over a year now, but lately they are pretty relentless. Yesterday I was having them all day, Iâ€™m not even sure why. I also just relapsed with my eating disorder. Every day I either restrict calories or eat and then make myself sick. I threw up twice yesterday. When it came time to go to bed I could not think about anything other than killing myself. I started to drift off and as I did I started picturing everyone who knows me going to my funeral and reacting to my […]

6/25/2013 12 comments

I’m a monster.

by Jayykeith3312 6/17/2013

written by Jayykeith3312

I’m not sure what I’m doing anymore. The fear of being alone seems to consume me. These girls who say they love me, they can’t be serious. How could they love me when they haven’t tried to know me. I’m not trying to lead them on. I’m just too nice to tell them what I really think. At least that’s what I’ve been telling myself. I’ve been thinking about death again. But is death what I want currently? I don’t have the desire to sleep except when I wake up in the morning because sleeping is much easier than going through the day. Sometimes being […]

6/17/2013 2 comments

Up At Dawn

by raincloudz 6/17/2013

written by raincloudz

i think theres something up with me. it takes me forever to fall asleep (if i do). smoking doesnt do anything and i dont want to have to drink myself to sleep every night. i have no appetite despite my growling stomach. i know i need to eat and thats really the only reason i eat now, because i know i have to. i have no desire to do anything or be around anyone or talk with anyone lately and most of the time i wish everyone would leave me alone for a while. everything seems monotonous. everything seems banal. all i want to do […]

6/17/2013 1 comment

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