July 12, 2013.
R.IP. Jacqueline Elise N.
She will be remembered lovingly, and remain in our hearts forever. we will regret the day we told her to die. We will regret the day we made fun of her. We will regret the day we said she was complaining, that she should fuck off. We will regret it all. Jacqueline, smart, top of her class, beautiful, loving, poetic, creative, and dead. All she was learning had weighed her down, her final months were spent saying her hellos as she was never fond of goodbyes. And then, July 13. She said her last hello, and plummeted nearly 22 storys, to her death. leaving behind only few important things: Her poetry, her journals, her notes, and her memory. Rest in peace, Dear Jacqueline.
Bang bang dear,
take the gun to your skull,
just one bullet,
one trigger to pull.
fly fly dear,
take the air and fly,
leave behind your pain,
as you finally die.
Swing Swing dear,
your rope is a jewel,
a necklace of hope,
your best known tool.
wear it with pride,
and smile wide,
and remember what they told you,
they said you should’ve died.
July 12, 2013
R.I.P. Me.
3 comments
Huh, that’s similar to my first chosen date, if you flip-flop the numbers. Is that your birthday or is there some other significance?
I hope you get some comfort fantasizing about their reactions…but if you really do this, you won’t get any satisfaction from it, because you won’t be around to feel it. I hope you find a way to show ’em all by living well instead. What’s that saying… “living well is the best revenge”? Yeah, fuck ’em!
That is a long way away. If you can wait 3 months, why not try 6? Or 9? Or 12? That is a long time to try to fixs or to at least try. School is hard, so many people overwhelmed and too much pride to show it. In 10 years, most of those people will grow up and realize how many mistakes they made. Nonr of us are perfect. Not me, and not you. Its not fair, the world isnt fair or perfect. Im sure you are so beautiful, creative, smart, poetic, and loving. Try not to judge them, right or wrong. Maybe life will change in those months. We are only human, dont blame them. You are perfect how you are, don’t give up. If you ever want to chat or vent, feel free to email wingkongexchange@hushmail.com
You describe me rather well, with the top of her class, beautiful, loving, and creative business. Often they don’t get that those of us whom they overlook are the ones who are in need of the most attention. But I agree with SadBk – you won’t be around to get the satisfaction from their reactions. (I admit that one of my favorite things is fantasizing about them.) Alternatively, sometimes I think the task of living is simply too much of a burden. But, alas, we are here anyway, so we might as well figure it out.
I don’t know if this will be much help to your situation, but when I feel like I’m especially weighed down with life I eat really unhealthy food while watching Spongebob. And then after I’ve gathered myself (and laughed for a while) I try to be kind of serious and think about why the fuck I’m supposed to be on this hellish planet. I haven’t come up with an answer yet, but wondering has so far given me enough reasons to stay.