Does Anybody ?

does anybody know that alone feeling ? that feeling of feeling worthless the feeling of wanting to cry all the time because you are lost you dont know where you belong. you try to smile and laugh try to pretend to be happy but deep down inside you are screaming out screaming to be heard for them to see that all you long for is a hug that will make you feel so safe. crying these tears for no apparent reason, i feel empty i am a walking dead soul i look in the mirror and i dont see who i am . i see a broken girl with cuts on her arm i see a beautiful mess. i am my own destruction . i see somebody that have lost everything , i see right through my paper ripped thin skin . but i wonder if people see the same i wonder if they can feel my pain when they look in my eyes i wonder if they are confused just like me . i dont know whats worth anymore living life and feeling this way or dying and  leaving the pain . suicide been on my mind i dont know if its time i dont know about my so called precious life . i hate it i hate myself . i am a rotting apple looks so perfect on the outside but bite down its disgusting and bitter . while tears are streaming down my face my heart beating faster  and faster all i wanna do is run away . i fallen and i cant get up i see the blood ozzing out my cuts i done it again i promised i wouldnt but i blacked out the pain and hurt took over me. im sitting in tears once again so much more lost and confused then before . what do i do . does anybody care ?

cause i am to the point where i dont .