i’ve been down since forever and this spring i’ve had enough. I feel trapped inside my heavy body and canÂ¨t wait to get out. i avoid social situations but my BF has many friends and sometimes they come to our place. I mostly hide in my bedroom and he’s ashamed. But I can’t stand social situations. I start crying. Everyone’s looking weird at me and I’ve lost them forever, I will always be the weird chick that started crying. I hate it when my bf says i don’t try hard enough and that he’s ashamed of me. My dad used to tell me that he’s ashamed of me and it left a huge scar. By bf’s friend recently killed himself. it’s very tragic of course and I miss him too. But now I can’t die. Selfish I know. But that was the first thought I had.
so what to do. I want to take a break from life. But I don’t know how.
Same here… Social situations sometimes get unbearable but I try my very best anyway whenever I can and cry later. It’s still not enough, as if there had been no effort. No matter how much pain I’m in, no matter how horridly it hurts to be among groups of people, I get an F for effort and told that I’m embarrassing. Wish there was a way to help people understand. But there isn’t.