A good friend of mine recently hung himself and now everyone around town is buying and selling some yellow “suicide awareness” bracelets. As a person who has been in and out of the psych ward several times for suicide attempts, I just find it to be a little ridiculous.
People don’t understand that suicide is a very personal choice. It’s based on rational (subjectively rational that is) reasons which can’t always be resolved through external support (especially the psychiatric system’s definition of ‘support’ yuck, I don’t even want to go there) the support that people usually give to suicidal/depressed people is pity or sympathy which is not what most depressed people need.
Personally I believe in the right to die and I respect any adult, mature decision to end one’s life. It’s sad to see, but it has to be the person’s choice or else it’s oppression. I hate seeing someone decide another person’s fate by playing God. I don’t agree that it’s the state’s responsibility to keep a person safe from them self, that’s ridiculous.
I’m sorry your friend passed away, I’m sure we can all empathize with that decision and mindset. I agree, I think it’s stupid to raise awareness for something like this, raise awareness for depression or mental illnesses, but suicide is completely up to the person deciding to do it. Support that person in any way you can, but in the end it’s their decision. (Sorry if that wasn’t the point you were getting at)
It’s also a self serving purpose. These people feel so noble about it ‘I’m saving lives!’ when in the end they’re not doing it to benefit anyone other than themselves. They think by wearing a stupid bracelet they’re support others, but really it’s just an ego boosting thing. It makes them feel good about themselves thinking they’re helping towards a good cause, when in reality it’s something they know nothing about.
If you want to help a suicidal person, talk to them, support them, by wearing a dumb bracelet you’re doing nothing.
That’s exactly the point I was getting at. The whole problem with suicide is that other people don’t understand. Everyone says it’s selfish to kill yourself. I personally thinks it’s selfish to make someone feel guilty for not wanting to stay alive anymore. It’s selfish to make a miserable person suffer through life just so you can interact with them every once in awhile and so you don’t have to feel sad about their death. I mean everybody dies. I am sad about my friend’s death as with any death. This one has been particularly hard actually, but I am not upset with him. I don’t blame him or think he’s selfish. It’s just a lot harder now, especially when I feel depressed. I have pretty much resigned to a life of misery in hope of an early death. Maybe my liver will give out.
Wow, I have been saying these same things forever and its good to know there are like minded individuals out there…..I agree with everything everyone said I have nothing to add except that people will always target the suicide rather than the circumstances that led up to it. Its easier for society to say “suicide is wrong” then to sit down and actually consider if the reason they think its wrong really makes any sense. Also, I’m sorry about the loss of your friend. Its hard but at least you know that he isn’t suffering from this wretched place anymore.
My youngest sister’s best friend hung herself about 15-16 months ago. This was someone she grew up with, was like her “partner in crime,” and whom i had the pleasure of knowing somewhat closely, as she was frequently around our home… i gave them rides sometimes, she even gave me a ride a couple times.
They had bracelets too. I was like “…”
The bracelet is all about a status symbol, all about “showing others you care.” As if showing the living and non-suicidal that you “care,” means anything at all. What most of them are showing, is that they “care” about portraying an image of compassion, when in fact, most of them will shun and avoid any suicidal person, and as a last resort, try to guilt trip them into superficially and artificially altering their behavior… and if they don’t, or can’t, then guess what? They abandon the person who most needs someone to care enough to try to make things better.
Bracelets are sold because someone knows they can exploit the typical human desire to portray an appealing self-image to others, so that they will feel more liked, more likable.
I also find it ironic that the bracelet can also be seen as a reminder that suicide is always an option. It’s morbidly humorous, to me, that people are probably unwittingly “reminding people that suicide is an option.”
“Hey, my bracelet wants to remind you that there’s always suicide!”
“if everything sucks, remember that you can always just end your life!”
If you are visiting this site, then you have known and felt most of the things described by sigh. How is it selfish to end so much misery and pain? You are helping yourself, you are ending your suffering. Don’t try to post something with contradictory situations, most of us have a family, with people that care. Most of us have many many people who would be deeply affected by us killing them self. It is hard to get help because you become ostracized from your friends or people who you try to tell. Someone who doesn’t think about it everyday just doesn’t know. People on here know, we understand. But understand, it is not a legit option. You will destroy the worlds of MANY people that know and care about you. A bracelet is not a reminder that suicide is an option. We may view it that way, but please look at it differently. If my friend committed suicide, I would wear a bracelet to honor them; not to prove that suicide is always a justifiable option; rather, that it is a horrible consequence of someone who probably just needed someone to talk to, who would understand and empathize and FUCKING CARE. Because I’m a young man who cares about anyone who has had to struggle with this shit. If you want a bracelet, I tie hemp knot bracelets, anklets, and necklaces. I will tie you a “suicide bracelet”, but it would not be meant to be a reminder that you can always just commit suicide, it would be a reminder to NEVER do that.
I would tie you a snazzy looking bracelet that you would be happy and proud to wear. I would pay the shipping to send it right to you. And you would feel god damn special to receive it, just like I would feel god damn special to tie it and send it to you. Because in both instances, you and I felt special either receiving a gift, or making and giving a gift. Just ask me.
No, you’re missing the point. The bracelet does not represent what it is said to represent, but instead, it represents the fact that people “want to look compassionate,” rather than simply /being/ compassionate. Compassion is not about what other people think of you, or the image you portray. The bracelet is not about suicide, it’s about self image, and about “manipulating” what other people see when they look at you.
If i see someone wearing a suicide bracelet, i don’t think “this person thinks suicide is a problem that needs more visibility,” but rather “this person wants others to think they care about this issue.” Whether the wearer of such an item /actually cares/, is not necessarily represented by the purchasing and wearing of an item. But what is clearly represented, is that person’s desire to appear a certain way, to others.
Like so many others, you don’t seem to understand that suicide has absolutely nothing to do with those left behind, and everything to do with the person making the choice. This is why so many of us here at SP emphasize careful and thorough consideration and reflection, prior to any such potential decision.
It’s not about thinking no one cares, it’s not about thinking no one will notice, it’s not about thinking. It’s not about being right or wrong. It’s about /suffering/, and being unwilling to continue experiencing something that may be impossible to change.
But sure, some people do it too soon or too hastily, or for “the wrong reasons.” But others… some of them should be hailed as heroes for being courageous enough to willingly face the unknown, and the possibility of never existing again.
0 is infinitely greater than -1.
If all you have is suffering, then it’s better to not have that, even if that means dying sooner than others, or even yourself, might prefer.
Part of my own personal opinion and principles, says that people should have at least one valid reason for choosing to die, and it should be something they can’t fix. I think if whatever is wrong can be fixed or improved to a manageable level, then suicide should not be the answer. But each person is their own, and it’s not about what i think, or whether i approve, or whether anyone approves. It’s about whether the individual is willing to continue. If they aren’t, there is sometimes nothing any of us can do, to make them want to continue experiencing whatever it is they don’t want. I also think it’s wrong (but often effective) to guilt trip people out of the choice to exit their own life. Sometimes things are wrong, and we know it, and we do them anyway, because it’s what we want. That can apply to both the suicides, as well as the survivors.
Exactly! My friend’s family had a party over the weekend for his birthday, like a memorial/ benefit type thing. There were people there that had no idea what the party was even for or who my friend was. There were people there buying bracelets because they saw them on others. All the money raised at the party went towards suicide awareness. I don’t understand that. Raising awareness for suicide or anything for that matter; raising awareness for breast cancer or aids or whatever, it makes no sense. People know these things exist. Being aware that suicide happens or that cancer happens doesn’t solve anything. It’s not like you can cure cancer by simply being aware of its existence. The bracelets are just what clevername said; they just make people feel better about themselves. And to me the bracelets are just a reminder that people won’t change or care. The post was meant to be ironic. Of course I know the bracelets aren’t promoting suicide, but to me they seem more harmful than helpful. I won’t be trying to kill myself, even though I have rationally thought it out and have my valid reasons. But the bracelets make me sad; they remind me that the only person that would care or understand is gone and everyone that’s left doesn’t give two shits.
11 comments
Very true, it is an option.
A good friend of mine recently hung himself and now everyone around town is buying and selling some yellow “suicide awareness” bracelets. As a person who has been in and out of the psych ward several times for suicide attempts, I just find it to be a little ridiculous.
People don’t understand that suicide is a very personal choice. It’s based on rational (subjectively rational that is) reasons which can’t always be resolved through external support (especially the psychiatric system’s definition of ‘support’ yuck, I don’t even want to go there) the support that people usually give to suicidal/depressed people is pity or sympathy which is not what most depressed people need.
Personally I believe in the right to die and I respect any adult, mature decision to end one’s life. It’s sad to see, but it has to be the person’s choice or else it’s oppression. I hate seeing someone decide another person’s fate by playing God. I don’t agree that it’s the state’s responsibility to keep a person safe from them self, that’s ridiculous.
I’m sorry your friend passed away, I’m sure we can all empathize with that decision and mindset. I agree, I think it’s stupid to raise awareness for something like this, raise awareness for depression or mental illnesses, but suicide is completely up to the person deciding to do it. Support that person in any way you can, but in the end it’s their decision. (Sorry if that wasn’t the point you were getting at)
It’s also a self serving purpose. These people feel so noble about it ‘I’m saving lives!’ when in the end they’re not doing it to benefit anyone other than themselves. They think by wearing a stupid bracelet they’re support others, but really it’s just an ego boosting thing. It makes them feel good about themselves thinking they’re helping towards a good cause, when in reality it’s something they know nothing about.
If you want to help a suicidal person, talk to them, support them, by wearing a dumb bracelet you’re doing nothing.
That’s exactly the point I was getting at. The whole problem with suicide is that other people don’t understand. Everyone says it’s selfish to kill yourself. I personally thinks it’s selfish to make someone feel guilty for not wanting to stay alive anymore. It’s selfish to make a miserable person suffer through life just so you can interact with them every once in awhile and so you don’t have to feel sad about their death. I mean everybody dies. I am sad about my friend’s death as with any death. This one has been particularly hard actually, but I am not upset with him. I don’t blame him or think he’s selfish. It’s just a lot harder now, especially when I feel depressed. I have pretty much resigned to a life of misery in hope of an early death. Maybe my liver will give out.
Wow, I have been saying these same things forever and its good to know there are like minded individuals out there…..I agree with everything everyone said I have nothing to add except that people will always target the suicide rather than the circumstances that led up to it. Its easier for society to say “suicide is wrong” then to sit down and actually consider if the reason they think its wrong really makes any sense. Also, I’m sorry about the loss of your friend. Its hard but at least you know that he isn’t suffering from this wretched place anymore.
My youngest sister’s best friend hung herself about 15-16 months ago. This was someone she grew up with, was like her “partner in crime,” and whom i had the pleasure of knowing somewhat closely, as she was frequently around our home… i gave them rides sometimes, she even gave me a ride a couple times.
They had bracelets too. I was like “…”
The bracelet is all about a status symbol, all about “showing others you care.” As if showing the living and non-suicidal that you “care,” means anything at all. What most of them are showing, is that they “care” about portraying an image of compassion, when in fact, most of them will shun and avoid any suicidal person, and as a last resort, try to guilt trip them into superficially and artificially altering their behavior… and if they don’t, or can’t, then guess what? They abandon the person who most needs someone to care enough to try to make things better.
Bracelets are sold because someone knows they can exploit the typical human desire to portray an appealing self-image to others, so that they will feel more liked, more likable.
I also find it ironic that the bracelet can also be seen as a reminder that suicide is always an option. It’s morbidly humorous, to me, that people are probably unwittingly “reminding people that suicide is an option.”
“Hey, my bracelet wants to remind you that there’s always suicide!”
“if everything sucks, remember that you can always just end your life!”
“Life sucks? READ MY BRACELET!”
suicide bracelet. lol.
If you are visiting this site, then you have known and felt most of the things described by sigh. How is it selfish to end so much misery and pain? You are helping yourself, you are ending your suffering. Don’t try to post something with contradictory situations, most of us have a family, with people that care. Most of us have many many people who would be deeply affected by us killing them self. It is hard to get help because you become ostracized from your friends or people who you try to tell. Someone who doesn’t think about it everyday just doesn’t know. People on here know, we understand. But understand, it is not a legit option. You will destroy the worlds of MANY people that know and care about you. A bracelet is not a reminder that suicide is an option. We may view it that way, but please look at it differently. If my friend committed suicide, I would wear a bracelet to honor them; not to prove that suicide is always a justifiable option; rather, that it is a horrible consequence of someone who probably just needed someone to talk to, who would understand and empathize and FUCKING CARE. Because I’m a young man who cares about anyone who has had to struggle with this shit. If you want a bracelet, I tie hemp knot bracelets, anklets, and necklaces. I will tie you a “suicide bracelet”, but it would not be meant to be a reminder that you can always just commit suicide, it would be a reminder to NEVER do that.
I would tie you a snazzy looking bracelet that you would be happy and proud to wear. I would pay the shipping to send it right to you. And you would feel god damn special to receive it, just like I would feel god damn special to tie it and send it to you. Because in both instances, you and I felt special either receiving a gift, or making and giving a gift. Just ask me.
No, you’re missing the point. The bracelet does not represent what it is said to represent, but instead, it represents the fact that people “want to look compassionate,” rather than simply /being/ compassionate. Compassion is not about what other people think of you, or the image you portray. The bracelet is not about suicide, it’s about self image, and about “manipulating” what other people see when they look at you.
If i see someone wearing a suicide bracelet, i don’t think “this person thinks suicide is a problem that needs more visibility,” but rather “this person wants others to think they care about this issue.” Whether the wearer of such an item /actually cares/, is not necessarily represented by the purchasing and wearing of an item. But what is clearly represented, is that person’s desire to appear a certain way, to others.
Like so many others, you don’t seem to understand that suicide has absolutely nothing to do with those left behind, and everything to do with the person making the choice. This is why so many of us here at SP emphasize careful and thorough consideration and reflection, prior to any such potential decision.
It’s not about thinking no one cares, it’s not about thinking no one will notice, it’s not about thinking. It’s not about being right or wrong. It’s about /suffering/, and being unwilling to continue experiencing something that may be impossible to change.
But sure, some people do it too soon or too hastily, or for “the wrong reasons.” But others… some of them should be hailed as heroes for being courageous enough to willingly face the unknown, and the possibility of never existing again.
0 is infinitely greater than -1.
If all you have is suffering, then it’s better to not have that, even if that means dying sooner than others, or even yourself, might prefer.
Part of my own personal opinion and principles, says that people should have at least one valid reason for choosing to die, and it should be something they can’t fix. I think if whatever is wrong can be fixed or improved to a manageable level, then suicide should not be the answer. But each person is their own, and it’s not about what i think, or whether i approve, or whether anyone approves. It’s about whether the individual is willing to continue. If they aren’t, there is sometimes nothing any of us can do, to make them want to continue experiencing whatever it is they don’t want. I also think it’s wrong (but often effective) to guilt trip people out of the choice to exit their own life. Sometimes things are wrong, and we know it, and we do them anyway, because it’s what we want. That can apply to both the suicides, as well as the survivors.
Exactly! My friend’s family had a party over the weekend for his birthday, like a memorial/ benefit type thing. There were people there that had no idea what the party was even for or who my friend was. There were people there buying bracelets because they saw them on others. All the money raised at the party went towards suicide awareness. I don’t understand that. Raising awareness for suicide or anything for that matter; raising awareness for breast cancer or aids or whatever, it makes no sense. People know these things exist. Being aware that suicide happens or that cancer happens doesn’t solve anything. It’s not like you can cure cancer by simply being aware of its existence. The bracelets are just what clevername said; they just make people feel better about themselves. And to me the bracelets are just a reminder that people won’t change or care. The post was meant to be ironic. Of course I know the bracelets aren’t promoting suicide, but to me they seem more harmful than helpful. I won’t be trying to kill myself, even though I have rationally thought it out and have my valid reasons. But the bracelets make me sad; they remind me that the only person that would care or understand is gone and everyone that’s left doesn’t give two shits.