The depressing and suicidal thoughts are getting worse day by day. This time I didn’t even wait for my cuts to heal before I was tearing into my skin again. I’ve come to love the sting and burn of my cuts, and to a point it terrifies me. I know my one friend who I’ve been going through things with for the past few years attempted suicide again last night. Something in me feels like within her next couple of tries she will succeed…and I’ll follow right after. I don’t want to imagine a world without her. I can’t. I know it sounds pathetic and needy but I cannot be left alone…a life without her is no life at all. I haven’t been able to sleep very well in these past few weeks, and I’m beginning to take sleeping pills. Nothing prescribed, just over the counter Tylenol PM…I tend to take more than the recommended dosage to knock me out for a long enough time that I can forget about everything for a little. I’m secretly hoping though that one day I’ll have the courage to take just enough to put me to sleep forever.
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3 comments
there has been a lot discussed about using tylenol….. evidently it isnt a good way to go.
You are your own worst enemy and, finally, your only real enemy. Try not doing that.
OTC meds are actually one of the worst ways to go because they are very unreliable and most likely you’ll wake up with a tube down your throat pumping your stomach….