Not worth living

Anger kills meToday I had most likely the worst day with my anger in ages. Because of issues with my ex I got so angry to the point that one of my bet mates had to put me in a headlock and hold me down and squeeze my hards so I couldn’t move. Throughout the day it got worst but I think it was only so bad because I didn’t have my boyfriend by my side keeping me sane i come home and feel like I’m gonna die. I stared at my weapon I have used many times over and thought is it worth itt? Is it worth seeing new scares on my wrist and knowing that my boyfriend will see them tomorrow? I don’t know. But I feel so lonely and worthless and like I’m a danger to everyone. Would it be best for me to die? My hand still hurts from when I puncdomes wallToday I had most likely the worst day with my anger in ages. Because of issues with my ex I got so angry to the point that one of my bet mates had to put me in a headlock and hold me down and squeeze my hards so I couldn’t move. Throughout the day it got worst but I think it was only so bad because I didn’t have my boyfriend by my side keeping me sane i come home and feel like I’m gonna die. I stared at my weapon I have used many times over and thought is it worth itt? Is it worth seeing new scares on my wrist and knowing that my boyfriend will see them tomorrow? I don’t know. But I feel so lonely and worthless and like I’m a danger to everyone. Would it be best for me to die? My hand still hurts from when I punched a metal pole today. What will happen if I snap tonight? I had a flashback on when my ex abused me and hit me. I just feel like life is not worth living