Where’s the courage?

It took me a while to figure out how useless cutting was and how much easier it is go suicide.To get teased and called offensivr names every day, why do I have to life through this? I thought of so many ways to die. I didn’t want my parents to see their daughter outside their backyard or in their room and I didnt want to be on the front cover of a newspaper. I kept staring at bottles. Was it worth it? I lost all the courage that got me here and realized, maybe not today or tomorrow. Its temporary. Please everybody, temporary pain will ease up one day. I know mine won’t come any sooner.