As I’m sure is the case with many of you, my story is fraught with pain and long-standing suffering. For sake of brevity I’ll cut to the present; intense chronic pain (fibro, tmjd, migraine), BPD, major depression, and general/social anxiety are all part of my day to day experience. At this point, it wouldn’t be an overstatement to say they ARE my day to day experience….consuming all the joys that life once presented. I’ve increasingly thought of suicide as a valid option to the never-ending plight I’ve endured. I look around and I see little worth continuing this fight for. I don’t want what this world has to offer, so why stick around? Out of fear? That seems to me the greatest single reason, and it’s not good enough. I just don’t know anymore.
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I am only still here out of both fear and guilt towards my daughter and family. I don’t want to cause them pain, but I am DYING trying to exist in this hellhole. I can’t take another day and yet somehow I do. I suffer from all the conditions that you mentioned also, except for BPD. I also have a partially disabled hand that causes me chronic pain and PTSD. I HATE myself and I HATE this horrible existence.
about time you send me another email? 🙂
@Wifeisgone you’re on this site too? What a coincidence… ;P
on this site too? or post? This is the only suicide site I visit. I do comment on a lot of posts. 😛