Ready to Die Soon.

I’m in the same boat. I’m 27. My family doesn’t know either, or my friends. I’ve spent my life after school building a career from which I was made redundant 6 months ago. Pretty much completely addicted to valium also which I can’t bare to admit to my parents. I’m taking ridiculous amounts.
You should try telling your parents in detail exactly how you feel before you end up like me. There’s still plenty of roads for you to take.
All my friends do is drugs. So all I do now is drugs. I’ve given up boxing and running and life in general pretty much now.
Obviously there are ways which are painless but I’ve tried twice and woke up both times which is a shitter, I just ended up unconscious for a couple of days.
It’s pretty scary realising what you’ve done when you wake up and have a sudden realisation that your parents would no longer have you.
Just try telling your mum. Hope this helps a little.

No I don’t look down on you because of your age at all. I was on fluoxetine (Prozac), citalopram, mirtazipine and others as a teenager but they never worked. So I self medicated with recreational drugs which can only have made things worse I know. Now I’m stuck on like 140mg diazepam every day with a 20 bag of green to boot.
As a teenager I took a whole box of Prozac and everything else i had and 70cl of whisky and woke up :O I couldn’t believe it. Recently (2weeks ago) I took 1000mg valium, a box of tramadol and 70cl of whisky….I like whisky I guess lol …and I woke up. Last week I took another 100 10mg valium crushed up with a box of dihydrocodiene and 70cl of rum this time…..I woke up. The last two should have killed me stone dead.
I’ve come to realise that od’ing is harder than it seems! I’ve given up this technique and realised that I’m probably more likely to wake up brain damaged or with permanent liver damage than die peacefully. I truly urge you to reconsider. Because I say again, the success rate is low. How old are you if you don’t mind me asking?

I understand, I’ve been where you are. Literally.
I really feel sad for you that you’re on a site like this at your age. I can’t reiterate enough how much I think you should call the samaratins or some similar organisation though to talk through your problems with a third party person who won’t dismiss you as “attention seeking” Which I think is irresponsible on your parents part. However…
After my first try it was such a reality check that I started boxing, running and going to the gym. I wish to god I’d never messed around with other drugs so much though….especially valium. It’s the devils drug….wd’s are worse than heroin and crack combined. That’s what put an end to my boxing and general training. :'(
You should try pushing your limits before you check out. Go for a run and feel the endorphins! But MAKE yourself do it. It’s fucking hard I truly know but it’s worth a try, you only get one go and I’ve tried pretty much everything before I got to this point. I’ve boxed competitively, played guitar and sang at open mic nights …all kinds. I’m just a habitual drug user now and I can’t see a way out. Give it a try…please. You can beat this, I could have beaten this but I took lots of wrong choices. If just 1 person learned from my fuck ups it would be worth it. But I can’t emphasise enough how much exercise is the key to beating depression! It truly is.