I’m just alone. That’s it. You think that you’re getting better but then the littlest of things happen which hurt. And y0u don’t know why it hurts because it shouldn’t and it hasn’t in the past.
Try to make friends. Try to find out how to mix with people. Since when does it matter if people don’t like you for being alive? I’m just the aquatint if someone that I call a friend is out of company. Other than that, people don’t want to know me. It seems that potential friends are interested in you so long as you’re interesting. Then they find a way to ‘fix’ you to their liking. After that, you’re left alone. Just when you forgot the feeling of loneliness and just how terrible it is.
Thank you, life.
Is it really that unbelievable to think that maybe I want someone to talk to? Maybe it is. Maybe there’s something wrong with me. Some part of me that makes me so incredibly boring and unbelievable. The truth seems like such a network of lies. But I don’t think that it was my fault that I was bred into a life of lies. Everything I know and love a lie. I don’t know; I guess the world isn’t exactly what I expected. I just wish I had the freedom to, I don’t know, get rid of this sadness. Or escape it, at least.
I’m sorry. And I’m sorry for complaining. I guess that, maybe if there is a chance that somebody would read this; or even care, I think it would be a little bit easier. If just a little. Because as long as this is out there, then I can still pretend that I’m not so abandoned.
4 comments
Other humans can be the worst sometimes. I’ve never had much luck with friends either. I don’t know what to tell you, but you’re not the only one.
Hey you. I felt like that when I was younger, but don’t think it is necessarily a bad thing. By feeling abandoned, or in the outs of society, is true that you lose the opportunity to be part of the World, but at the same time you gain an alternative, which of course is suicide, the option to leave it. You are not alone in feeling alone, most people here are.
I understand and empathize, been that way my whole life. Loneliness sucks.
Whats really going on is more of a “separation” nowadays, a “splitting” of sorts….
I’ll explain…
Years ago, people/society as a whole generally shared a common morality/closeness that has largely been eroded in society now. There are a lot of reasons for that and why it has changed.
The effect of that are the ‘left behinds” of sorts…. those who are good people (not pefrect, coz no one is), and we don’t fit in well with the coldness and selfishness that is the norm out there now.
Thats the separation I am talking about. I know I am “old school” in caring and respecting others, and many of you know how you arent appreciated for who you are, how you get taken advantage of because you try to do the right thing, and get spit on, and thus hurt.
This is what I have noticed and experienced.
But the challenge is to find those who will love/respect you, as a friend to otherwise.
If you find it hard to find a good friend, its likely not you but the fact they have become )or never were) as good as you are.