I am starting to get scared of myself. Mostly when I think about the future. There is no possible way I can live for even 5 years it seems like. My thoughts are a nightmare sometimes. I have attempted suicide once before but my friend walked in on me after I took only a handful of pills. I don’t want to live in a mental hospital, I feel like jumping everyday. I cant imagine becoming as crazy as I’m scared I might.
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It’s better you realise you’re going crazy before you actually do go crazy I suppose. I often wonder if I’ll be here in 2019 (holy sh!t that’s scary) but I have a feeling I’d better live this year as if it were my last.