I don’t know who I am….

My belief is that a parent should guide a child to the kind of person they want to be. Not make the ultimate decision. I too struggle a big deal with that. Each individual has to shape themselves. To make my parents happy, at one point I was the carbon copy they wanted me to be. Er – not really actually. It was just an act. Because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t just be somebody that wasn’t me. Being the true you will always reward itself, even if that seems too many miles away.

We all get lost in life. Most of us here are lost in life. Some are struggling to find there way back into the reality they need to be in while some of us are just so scared. So scared that we will be hurt more then ever, fall harder then ever if we go back to the place where all the pain originated. But I think we could try something else. What is that? Don’t try to be who you are not. Sometimes, we must fight for truth.

When you say “cutting is the one thing I have control over”, I think of what I say, which is, “suicide is the only choice I have control over”. That is why I am so attached to the thought of me killing myself. Suicide always appears as something that can save me from all the pain. And cutting, to you, acts the same way. Maybe you yearn to stop the cutting. Maybe you see it is not wrong. And maybe I’m just a stranger, but I absolutely will not preach on anything about morality. But if you want to stop, you’ll have to fight just as hard as you have to fight to be the true you.

We all have bad habits, bad everything inside a bad life. But no matter how beaten, we always have the power to fight. You have control over that too, never forget that.