Yep…I’m losing hope. Again. I can only pray that next time I attempt suicide I succeed, in the hope that I don’t have to exist anymore. Who wants heaven or hell? It’s bullshit. I want to just not exist.
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Existence is to suffer. From the first breath til the day we die. I understand you. I wish not to exist. It haunts me. But I am too coward to do anything about it. So I linger in limbo each day painting a deep dark picture of what my life has become.
Well, it may not be that binary (heaven or hell).
You can search NDE and suicide and read about people’s near death experiences, but i know of no guarantee that we don’t eventually get reincarnated to learn similar lessons. To complicate things further, our emotional state and expectations may influence the ride. Bummer, huh?
learn similar lessons so you can forget them all and start over, over and over again… yeah that sounds purposeful and sensible to me.
NDEs are merely hallucinations produced by a brain in emergency mode.
And as anyone who has experimented with hallucinogens will confirm, your emotional state and environment at the time of the experience, is a very significant factor. That’s why we hallucinogen enthusiasts always warn and emphatically insist that such things should be done “in a safe environment and stable mindset.”
If you trip while in an unstable or “bad” mindset, or in an unfamiliar or dangerous environment… you’re going to have a bad time, and you risk permanently detrimental psychological impacts, or even catastrophic physical harm, possibly even to others. You have to be ready and in a good place, both physically and mentally. Don’t do it if you’re not ready.