Starting to wonder if you keep living a life full of suffering and stress if your brain doesnt just shut down on its own because it cant take anymore.  Destroy itself.  Always had memory and concentration problems and sometimes a memory lapse  cuz of my depression problems now i am just really disabled cuz of them.  But i am also in the worse place of my life for the last  couple of years.  I have felt traumatizing pain over and over.  I cant remember one day from the next anymore.  I cant rem if things happened today or yesterday or the day before.  my brain is in a fog all the time now.
Memory lapses like pumping gas in the car and paying for it then not rem doing it at all an having to go ask people who work in the store if you pumped and paid for gas and they tell u that u did but u have no memory of it at all. Â Turning on water to run a shower but no memory of it.
Going to places you have been to a hundred times and not recognizing any of it  feeling disoriented and lost.  The doctor told me if i kept going the way i was going i was going to loose my mind.. is this it, is this what she meant. I am really wondering if you keep pushing your body thru life but ur mind is in pain most of the time if your brain doesnt just start offing itself