alcohol destroyed my life

Hello,Ron.Yes,I am experienced in th mentally ill and alcoholic/addict field of research and development:) I Have not been abandoned by my parents for another person,though,and this must be a very deeply frightening thing that you went through when your mother did this.Theres probably a lot of different feelings you struggled with,and probably still do. Do you blame her for your alcoholism? I want to tell you a couple things..first-you can recover from alcoholism..its very likely you can recover a lot of your previous thought processes,and dreams and regain your desire to create or to explore..i recommend you to get a support system -Alcoholics Anonymous-of people who are doing this already,people who have learned how to get sober and STAY sober,and a place to talk about what youre going through.AA is a program that works if you can ( and you definitely CAN)understand the first three of the 12 steps,and are willing to show up and listen. Your body is still young enough that its very likely you can regain your health -IF you stay sober. Ive seen a lot of people get their minds back,and theres no promises,but it happens all th time:) Youre nervous breakdown is unfortunate,but its also something many of us have experienced,and I know from my past that once I stopped killin myself , I became well enough to no longer need a bunch of psyche meds. I only needed antidepressants ,once th fog cleared.Anti psychotics are very heavy drugs,and in my case,they created a heavier fog than the dope did! Coming off them was like an awakening. Im not on this site because im mentally and emotionally fit as a fiddle-lol-I struggle with myself and depression and anxiety-but im surviving today. I still hope for a drastically different lifestyle change once I am free of a commitment ive made . Youre not alone,R. Youre not destroyed yet-i can tell from your post that theres lots of brain cells that survived 🙂 or are regenerating-scientists now know that contrary to long held beliefs, neurons do in fact regenerate .Youre not done for yet:) What did you use to be interested in when you were healthier…revisit those dreams. Also-exercise helps your recovery process immensely.You can feel strong again…I hope you feel better,Ron. Theres a whole lifetime In front of you, and theres no need to fear it,or to face it alone. I suggest AA-theres lots of people there who are going through this,and you can make friends with them,and support each other.