It’s 4.25am and I’ve just came home from an hour long walk, the truth is I was looking to commit suicide tonight and my chosen method was to jump off a high ledge and land in the sea, dying of either shock, head injuiry, drowning or hypothermia or a combination of them all. I live in a seaside town so I thought this would be a very easy thing to accomplish but the highest point in the town where it would be possible to die is fenced off with barb wire. I spent a while looking for a lot of other spots but no where seems to high enough for me to die.
I’m 17 years old and I know a lot of you will say that I’ve got ‘my whole life ahead of me’ but I don’t feel that way at all and just don’t wanna do it anymore. I won’t post about the problems I have in life as they just sound pathetic compared to what others are going through. I’ve pushed all my friends away have dropped out of sixth form so it will be slightly easier for them when I’m gone as they will have the happy memories of the old me 🙂 I lock myself in my room 99% of the day just googling different suicide methods… I will attempt to find another spot tomorrow night so wish me luck.
Not sure why I wrote this I just wanted to vent but if anyone can suggest another method I will be open to any comments. Thanks for reading.
6 comments
That method is in my mind too a lot. There is a 400 foot tall bridge by where I live and I’ve been to it a couple times but never jumped. I have attempted other ways but this is the ultimate way out. I’m giving myself a little while longer again. I’m not gonna die today. IM 24. I hope you can find a way to live keep living. I’m in the same place so I don’t really know what to say.
I can’t really judge anyone for wanting end their life. It’s a question I struggle with daily and have since I hit puberty or a bit sooner. Though I would suggest finding a method that is less risky-the consequences of making a mistake are very dire. You’ll have a terrifying fall, if you land wrong, you’ll experience incredible pain, damage your body and perhaps if you’re lucky you might die quickly, but if you don’t die and are rescued, you might be paralyzed for life or who knows what else can happen.
Don’t get me wrong, I’ve also considered jumping into a lake or sea from a high place, but it’s not a very appealing way for me to go-there are other methods but we’re not allowed to discuss that here, of course you can always google.
I’m in my 40s, I’m sorry you feel you have end your life at such a young age. Despite the bad experiences I’ve had as a teen, I also had my greatest experiences in that age range as well. In fact that’s another reason I’m suicidal because I know my life will never again be as amazing as it was when I was around 18-30. Beyond that, it went to shit for me.
I’d recommend sticking around for a few more years because things could change. If it’s over a girl or guy it’s still not too late, unlike me…at least socially speaking 40 yr old men (and women) are not exactly a hot commodity unless you’re rich and have a chiseled physique.
Some people are just not that into life, the inevitable suffering, or what it has to offer. I get that. I think about dying often. I can assure you your problems are not pathetic. You are valid human being and quite thoughtful from your post.
Seek help if you can. Here is good, but also remember there are suicide hotlines. They are free. They have helped me. I call a few times a week sometimes. There is no judgement and I am never told what to do. I have gotten empathy and rationale every time.
Your friends care. You just can’t see it. I have been there and some days it takes locking myself in my apartment and calling for help in order to stay alive. You deserve to live. You deserve a life in its entirety.
I actually know just what you mean. Years ago I was so depressed, and I lived in the suburbs. I used to research train tracks in my area (this is before I could drive) that were away from curious eyes. I walked 45 minutes to get to one set, and typically, they were impossible to access due to recent upgrades in the area. Another time, when I had my license, I drove to another set of tracks and sat on them waiting. A rail way guard spotted my car on his nightly rounds and came and yelled at me.
Nowadays I’m always looking for cliffs and high buildings that I could access. I think the general opinion is that they have to be 14 stories high to incur death. Having a lot of difficulty.
There’s never a perfect spot it seems. It’s a project in itself just trying to find your place of demise.
from 400 feet. Its about 99 percent chance of deatth. Just saying. And I don’t think I would feel that much from that far of a fall.
I wish I lived near a bridge that tall.