Some days I feel like my chest is being crushed by all the love and care I would have wanted to give someone. Even now my heart is drowning in a sorrow that has no stars, and no laughter and no sleep.
Some days I wonder if ppl just can’t see how wonderful they really are.. even burned out, or damaged.. There is such beauty in a strong beating heart inside a good person.
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Nicely said xylem. I wish my soulmate could have seen that. i would have died for him. If only he could have seen what I REALLY had for him…I would have died for him. He told me I saved his life. I’m so glad I could have done that for him…but it just never came back, only games and deceit. What could have happened is unbelievable…but it is no more and I’m devastated…total and utter devastation.
@ kontinkatink Honestly I don’t know why I always find the emotionally unavailable guy to love and care for.. sometimes I think I just understand their pain so well that it is the only level of connection I can have.
U love the person, u give them your all but somehow it is not enough to bring them outta their own problems and miseries. How I wish I could just wash away everything. His past, my past… all dissolves and we can be 2 ppl meeting for the 1st time with our hearts still whole…
My life would have actually be ok if i were made of stone.. but I’m not, and some days I really can’t take it any more
I haven’t cried in a long time but today it is just one of those day when all the emotions and sorrows patiently waiting around to be felt are all suddenly sneaking up on me. I am so tired and sometimes it is just too much. The pain, the sorrow, how can it be all belong to me?
I completely agree with everything written here. Particularly with my most recent guy. He’s been running away from a life of rejection and hurt. All the love he has in his heart he pours into his work because he knows that will yield him results, where as women have always spurned him. He has my heart, I am someone who loves to the very end (I don’t really fall for many guys), but because he has suffered so much he just wants to throw his emotions out the door.
I hate him but I love him too. It’s times like these where I wish I was asexual.
@Rey isn’t just frustrating? cuz you know where he is coming from.. you understand his hesitation, his pain and it is at that level that u understand each other fully and unconditionally but all the love in the world is never enough to bring ppl outta their cycle of misery.. peace of mind and soul is not something someone can give u ..it just needs to happen inside you… I understand this I’ve gone through it
You nailed it on the head mate.
I’ve been saying this all along to the ‘normies’, you can’t therapy the fuck outta someone and expect results, they gotta want it themselves. Trouble is, do we leave ’em to rot in the meantime or do we keep at them (and potentially lose ourselves in our futile attempts)?
That’s why we focus on supporting the young, cause they still have a shot at turning things around. I’ve found a lot of solace in being the adult I needed when I was younger. I have to dig real deep, but some of the kids I meet are so special but broken that I am motivated to find something within me.
@Rey I’m glad you are using your experience to connect with the ones in need. I remember when i was younger I could have really benefited from someone being there especially an adult who has gone thru the emotions. Keep up the good work at least something positive can come out of the hardship you have endured.