Nearing the End, not there yet…

Most days, I feel like giving up… I have pets I live for now, nothing else.  I sit at work and wish no one would look or talk to me.  Most of the time a nasty comment comes from my mouth to lash out, it is all I have left.  I am tired of the stares. I have been trying to place my pets, I made a will and am preparing to commit suicide.  I don’t know when just yet.  I am writing letters to friends and family.  And even one to my employer who was the the most cause of my depression and stress.  Planning and preparing gives me a scene of security and a feeling of happiness…  Many people have goals, until your goal is to be prepared to leave this crazy world you have not had a goal at all.  At least not one as meaningful as this one.  I am not ready yet, but soon, I will be.