my life

OK, well I am sorry to hear that things have gotten so bad that you have tried 3 times to end yourself and still have thoughts of it. I have have been suicidal myself.
But I want to try to get you to change your thinking…. and start trying to make your life better instead of being down on yourself thinking of ending it. If your unhappy with your bad grades then decide to put more efort into your school work and pick those grades up. You can if you get focused and I will tell you the truth. A good education is very important to have a sucesful life.
You can do better on your grades. You just have to commit to studying and improving on them
You also said you feel like your fat and ugly.
Well if you feel like that then make some changes. Get on an exercise routine to lose some of the weight. You can lose weight if you exercise and change your eating habits.
You also can improve upon your appearance somehow. Dress nicer. Get your hair cut
keep yourself clean and so forth. TRY it.

If you had 2 girlfriends before and they didn’t work out. Thats ok. Keep trying
you will eventually find a girlfriend where things will work out.
Try and work on your self confidence. Try to believe you can change things
in your life. Start asking out girls when you see one you like.
Some will say no. Some will say yes. Dont take it personally when I girl says no to you
Dating is almost like a numbers game really. You just have to try to find a girl buy occasionally
asking one out and sometimes they say No sometimes they say YES and when they say Yes
try and make it work. If it doesnt work then just move on and keep trying
eventually you will find the right girl for you but you have to try
and you can even try online dating sites also.

dont cut. When you have the urge to cut > STOP > and Do Something else instead like EXERCISE
go out for a walk or a jog. or join a gym and lift weights, swim, play something that
keeps you active. Like swimming or raquet ball or basketball or something

challege yourself to get better