O.k. guys. I have been in a relationship with a woman who has some serious emotional disabilities. Things get heated frequently and I have become very abusive. Luckily for her she left 2days ago. We have been raising our kids together so I have lost a son as well. The house is full of her possessions, presence, and memories. I find myself staring at her empty spot in our bed and i have begun sleeping with her pajamas in my hands. I have no help with bills. Its looking hopeless and the pain is overwhelming. All I know how to be is a family man and my family is destroyed. I find myself more convinced every hour that I have lived long and hard enough. What good is a man who hurts the person he loves most?
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Obviously I don’t know your situation, so I don’t mean to sound like I’m knowledgeable, but at this point maybe it’s worth being as honest w her as you are w yourself? Tell her what is going through your mind, that you’re sorry, that your life is so connected to hers you evidently feel like half of a person without her, etc. If she’s already left there’s not really a loss factor in telling her you still love and miss her- that can only result in no change or a positive change, imo. Of course you know her, you know what’s best here, but I feel like it’s a safe assumption to say you’re looking for a different perspective, so hopefully that ^ helps?
Don’t give up though- all you have is time, so why not spend it on the person who matters 🙂
Thank you. I took your advice amd sent her an open honest assessment of my feelings and guilt. I do not think I will get a reply. But I suppose a little hope goes a long way when you just feel like ending yourself anyway. The only thing I cant tell her is how much it hurts. I cannot burden her with my suicidal feelings. Which is hard, because there is nobody else I would talk to about it. I guess thats why I am here on an anonymous forum.