My parents took me in. I have no idea how I got here. I can’t figure out how to care about anything. I miss my ex like crazy. It’s been a long time and I still wish I could have her back. We were together six years and I really thought it was going to be forever. Now I’ve had 3 jobs since last year and can’t seem to hold anything down. I really just still want to end it but I’m afraid and know it would kill my parents. I’m not sure anyone else would care and not sure how to make friends or […]
So I’ve just broken up with my girfriend of 2 and half years and I’m devastated; I’m heartbroken.
all I can think is I’m too blame, I wish I cared more for her when we were together. Instead I’m sitting here contemplating stupid things.
I’ve been such an idiot. I want her back I need her.
Everytime I go outside and see normal happy people it shakes me up inside. I press my lips together, and shut my eyes in tension. All the people that I used to know, just normal guys got it all. Money, house, car, relationship/marriage. Everything. All these people were just normal, nothing special, most were dumber than me academically, similar or worse socially. Many were younger. Yet all of them got it all together, got awesome jobs, get paid well. Got everything. Why is it that everytime I try to do something I fail? I do great with things, any complex problem I can solve as […]
So, here’s a little diddy I’ve composed. Just wanted to prove I can string together a coherent concept. I’ve titled it “Intensify” because it starts out with arpeggios, then chords, then power chords.
Again, this is a raw recording. I didn’t bother polishing it.
I just got the message, from my ex, she want’s to go out for a drink with me tomorrow night!! I still love her, so that’s great right ? so why em I posting this crap here?
Well it is not great, this is not fucking great at all. And here is why :
we have been together for almost 5 years, and she have break up with me 2 months ago, 3 weeks ago she had told me she have meet someone and that they are dating for few days now. But 2 weeks ago I have found out she had been cheating with this guy […]
Suicide is pretty & Suicide is Funny.
So when you add it all together, I guess Suicide is Pretty Funny!!
The powder burns inside my mouth begin to scream and shout.
My mom is a Fag & my Dad is to.
All the kids make-fun of me at school.
So…. I put my .38 caliber inside my mouth and make a mess all on the bed, skull fragments on the sheets & on the spread.
SUICIDE IS PRETTY FUNNY.
I don’t want to fight with the Thunder in my head anymore.
All the other kids say I’m a whore, with the cellphone pictures of my panties […]
Well I made it thru today with only a few minor scratches and awkward moments at work. To those of u who commented this morning (my time), may ur karmic bank accounts overflow!! Without spewing too many platitudes u guys really helped. Example….where I wouldve gone to the bathroom at work and watched YouTube videos of the golden gate bridge and budd dwyer repeatedly, I just checked ur comments on my post. I reckon that’s much healthier behaviour. Hang tough mofos and try to keep it together. That’s all I can do atm.
There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.
I lost my soulmate.
I loved her with all of my heart. We’ve known each other for five and a half years and we were best friends. It was an online relationship and we were young so we weren’t serious about it. But a few years ago we realized we could really make this work and so we tried. We stood by each other through thick and thin, through the stress of me having a job and graduating high school and everything. I felt like I had the perfect future because we promised each other we would go to the same college and work in the […]
Hello. In a few hours I have an interview and it’ll probably be a disappointment. But for right now I wanted to ask you a question. What do you guys do for entertainment? How do you guys get your mind off of things. I play video games and watch youtube ( I love game grumps and I’m watching the new episode right now). I also love animation. Not working on it, but seeing the process and the final product is so cool. I have major respect for anyone who can animate. It’s just so cool to see it all come together. So what do you […]
I always want to remember how we would walk down that trail to look at the river and how we left school a couple times just to go there. I want to remember how one time you took me to the little store by your house through the woods, and how you would cancel plans just to be with me. I want to remember when we were laying under the blankets on your bed (which we would do often) and we would just lay there in each others arms under the blankets. I want to remember how you smell, how you had that certain cologne […]
The guy I was seeing a couple weeks ago, Aaron, turned out to be a bust. He was a really nice and sweet guy, but his interest ran out. But that’s not my main problem. It’s Presley. I am madly in love with Presley, we wanted to spend the rest of our lives together, we were in love with each other, and then all the crap happened with Holly and Amy, he chose both of them over me, and yet we still love each other. I want to yell at him, I want to pound on his chest and beat all of my pain away as […]
Do I have to spend my life trying to try? Trying to fix things? No. Wrong question. But yes, being alive is being hopeful. Hopeful? Even though life eats you up all the way from the inside before it even begins to show on the outside. I’m talking about the scars you have from letting blood, because that makes sense; you cut yourself and blood escapes the crease that separates what binds the skin together.
Nor the bags under your eyes caused from endless sleepless nights or disturbed sleep caused by misread and confounding dreams that make you want to avoid sleep, one of the only […]
I thought about you again today. I talked about you. It was quite a mess. I couldn’t gather up the words to say. There is just too much to share.
Good times and bad, you were always there. As I was for you. Memories we shared I will forever cherish. Our connection, our ups, and downs. What we’ve been through, what I put you through, what you went through, and those the same for me.
My most precious memory of us together was the night at Rock Fest. The only band we came to see was HURT and Blue October. I remember when you got to […]
I am tired, ive struggled for many years now, through chronic pain and major depression. I became distant from my partner and now i have lost her, we have been separated for the last year, and while i love her with all my heart i know we can never be together again,
my regret will be leaving my little girls, but i know watching there Daddy slowly decline will be worse for them, i only have one wish, and that is to hope they will know that daddy will love them forever, and i will always be with them, i only have a week or two […]
Let’s make this a monthly thing, anyone can start it.
Once a month, near the end of the month, let’s have “Tea time”.
Tea time is grabbing a cup of tea, coffee, water, soda, alcohol, simpily something to drink. (If you have nothing, that’s ok you don’t have to).
The rules will apply:
1) No hate.
2) No methods.
3) No partners (the same basic rules of SP).
4) No random blurts (you can have fun but be considerate).
5) No judgements.
6) Let each other express themselves freely.
7) Relax and share something about yourself.
This is a chance to talk in a group or one on one with someone. Discussions will follow with;
Suicide (doesn’t […]
I play piano and it really helps take my mind off of things. I’m always running out of things to play, or stuck at current pieces I’m working on. So I thought, to help practice and to distract my mind, maybe i should start uploading piano request videos.
So, name a song, any song you would like to hear. Hopefully i can put something together within 24 hours.
(I also do guitar)
If you’re in the US, wouldn’t it be crazy if a group of us got together and lived in a place together? Helping each other financially, emotionally, contributing together.. It’s probably crazy.. But for those who have no one, like me, i think its the best thing we could ask for right now.. And im all for it, if anyone else is..
23 hours left. (I’m sorry I’m going to post so much.)
Suicide Project. The name in it’s own.
Have you ever thought about is? Suicide project. That name. It’s cleaver. I would like to believe that it is that for a reason. For a purpose.
We the people of Suicide Project are almost like lab rats. Being watched. Just a group of people struggling with what is simpily death. I imagine someone is observing us. Seeing how we react to each other. How we help each other. What it’s like to be suicidal. Or you can look at it this way.
We are an ongoing project. As long […]